Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Waller's Dirty Dozen

Suicide Squad was a film with many cuts, many edits, and many complaints. The darkness was filled in with style, the ugly was made funny, this film was the potential uprising Warner Bros needed after "Man of Bore" and "Batman v. Superman v. Rotten Tomatoes". Sadly, even being the only decent film out of the three wasn't enough to win people over. Today on Pitch-It, I rework what Suicide Squad could have been.
First of all: Fire the soundtrack guy. Masking your movies quality with good songs doesn't fix the problem. But really, this film's plot is doomed either way. Jared Leto's Joker isn't captivating and The Enchantress is too big of a threat. I mean this The Suicide Squad, they shouldn't be expected to stop anything Superman-level. These people aren't around to save the world. And I've taken that to heart when I erased the entirety of the plot and thought of a new one. A mission a team of mostly-normal bad-guys could handle. In my version Amanda Waller didn't put the Squad together to battle "the next Superman", she instead put them together to prevent the next Superman from happening. Sure there are going to be more superpowered people, but if someone is trying to become/create a superhuman maybe Waller could stop that from happening. Enter Task Force X/The Suicide Squad, a secret government unit of criminals implanted with explosives in their necks to terminate them if they disobey orders. We'd establish that Task Force X has been around since the end of "Man of Steel" as the U.S. government knew Superman wouldn't be compliant with their demands. While they can give him the benefit of the doubt, they need to prevent less moral people from having Superman's level of power. And yes, the team is pre-established. Around two years to be exact. Meaning there are veteran members and new members in this film. The opening can be the veteran members (Rick Flag Jr, Bronze Tiger, Clock King, Platique, Black Spider, and Killer Frost) extracting a scientist named June Moon from a small village where she had been killing tribesmen in attempt to summon a demon. Moon is supposedly possessed by a witch called The Enchantress and rather than put the crazy woman down, Waller wants her on the team.
Why a dangerous witch? For the team's next mission, of course. We could have a scene of our Squad members in their individual cells at Bel Rev Prison. Wheeled in through the prison gates are the new recruits: El Diablo, Captain Boomerang, Deadshot, and Harley Quinn. Rather than being shown flashbacks we learn the character's origins through quick exchanges between Waller and Flag. "El Diablo's a metahuman who shoots fire and accidentally killed his family, now he wants atonement. Deadshot is an assassin, best at his craft. But he's got a daughter he'd do anything to keep safe. Captain Boomerang is an Australian bank robber. And yes, he throws boomerangs. Apparently he was caught by a metahuman with super speed, not that anybody saw him to confirm. And finally, Harleen Quinzel. She fell in love with The Joker. Enough said". That's it. The team is briefed on the bombs in their necks and the rewards for service on the squad. The mission: The European country of Markovia has been trying to create superpowered individuals, but to no avail. Word is they succeeded with the orphaned prince of the country Brion Markov. Joined by his sister Princess Terra, Brion is destined to lead Markovia in four months on his 21st Birthday. The country's current leader is Baron Frederick DeLamb who's political adviser Zviad Baazovi has been pulling DeLamb's strings. If Brion is allowed to be put in power he may be led by Zviad and The Baron to use his powers to initiate war on other countries. So they need to extract Brion without anyone knowing. When questioned, Waller claims she has an inside source feeding her this intel.
The Squad is flown into Markovia and every member has their assignment. Clock King is held in a secret U.S. bunker in a neighboring nation feeding information to the team. Thanks to his precision timing Clock King is used as the team's guide. Deadshot, Captain Boomerang, Bronze Tiger and Rick Flag disguise themselves as soldiers and accompany Waller's inside source in delivering Harley Quinn to Baron DeLamb as a bargaining chip. Being the woman-of-choice to one of America's most notorious criminals may come in handy in any future deals with the U.S. The informant-by the way-is Count Vertigo, a member of Vlatava's royal family. Vlatava was a country desecrated and absorbed into Markovia decades ago and Vertigo-with his own self applied superpowers-has tried for years to sneak into Markovia's government and destroy it from the inside. The rest of the Squad members are either sneaking in behind enemy lines or on standby in case a fight breaks out.
We watch more members of the Squad dying as the plot progresses. We learn Brion isn't the superpowered child, it's actually Terra. Since Terra is around twelve, El Diablo takes offense to Waller lying to them and forcing them to kidnap a child. He tries to take a stand and fight The Squad, claiming he won't be responsible for another child's misery. And boom. Waller blows his head off. Killer Frost had been harboring a secret kinship for her veteran Squad members and sacrifices herself to keep an army of soldiers from catching up with them. In his bunker Clock King tries to escape as he's been studying the bomb in his neck for years now and knows the exact time and date the bomb's wireless signal reboots. As soon as he escapes he is gunned down by the hidden agent Waller planted outside the bunker. While the Squad-and the captured Terra-escape to a helicopter, a lone sniper shot by Zviad hits the belt of explosives on Plastique. Rather than help her, Captain Boomerang kicks her off the copter and she explodes, causing the copter to spin out and crash. In the wreckage most members survive, but are weak. Black Spider is on the verge of dying and asks Rick to put him out of his misery. So he does. Surrounded by troops, Rick calls in the last resort: The Enchantress. Using her magic The Enchantress kills most of the soldiers. Just when the team thinks they're safe she turns on them and revives the Markovia soldiers. The Enchantress was able to magically undo her bomb, but Harley is able to kill Enchantress by surprise. The zombie soldiers remain and cannot be gunned down. Using his fatherly influence, Deadshot convinces Terra to use her diplomatic stature to order the zombies to stop as they still have a little human in them. He then convinces her to use her powers (she can control Earth like an Earthbender) to tunnel the team underground and to the nearest U.S. bunker.
Half the team is dead, Count Vertigo had been captured during one of the fights and Bronze Tiger had escaped. Turns out Clock King told Tiger about how the bombs worked and while Clock King was unable to escape, Tiger-at the same time-took the opportunity to surgically remove his bomb behind Rick's back. Waller is pissed she only has four guys left, but happy she can deliver Terra to U.S. scientists to be studied. Deadshot is effected by this because he doesn't want to hurt children, but Waller answers "It was her, or yours". In return for their efforts, Deadshot gets visitation rights to his daughter, Captain Boomerang gets a six-pack of beer and cable TV every weekend, and Harley Quinn is filled in on every crime The Joker commits in Gotham City, like bedtime stories. Rick Flag Jr and Amanda Waller discuss Terra and how they can't learn much else from her, but that a powerful billionaire would be happy to take Terra in return for hunting down Bronze Tiger. And so, Waller has Terra delivered to the assassin known as Deathstroke. And the hunt begins.
So with lore taken from DC Comic's history, diverse and power-balanced characters, and a reasonably tame plot I think I've come up with a much better plot than the film we got. It gives the Squad a mission they can handle, it works on an easier budget, and it's driven by dialog and interactions rather than side-plots. It's a story that can still work in the context of the DC Cinematic Universe and is distant enough to be entertaining to a non-superhero fan. Hopefully the future of The Suicide Squad movies do a better job at representing the immoral and unpredictable nature of this team.
Thanks for reading!
Did you enjoy my pitch for Suicide Squad? Comment below!

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