Panel Biter Podcasts

Thursday, July 13, 2017

TOT: Captain Cold's Kickoff

Remember that one time Captain Cold dismembered The Flash?
Well, not "the" Flash. But rather, "a" Flash. The Speed Force has been used by many well-established characters over the past eight decades or so and some of those chosen few have come from different timelines, different worlds, and entirely different realities. DC's Earth-3 being today's example. On Earth-3, all of our favorite heroes are swapped out for villains of similar-and almost exact-backstories. From Ultraman-a version of Superman who is weakened by sunlight and powered by Kryptonite-all the way to Jonathan Allen who was struck by lightning and became The Flash. Or "a" Flash. Or Johnny Quick. As Johnny Quick, he went from small-time killer and thief to one of The Crime Syndicate of America's deadliest members.
In the story "Forever Evil", The Crime Syndicate travel into the main DC Universe as their own world was destroyed. First order of business: trap the entire Justice League inside Firestorm's body. Check. Second: throw the Teen Titans through time. Check. And third: force all criminals on Earth to swear allegiance to the The Crime Syndicate. Or be vaporized like that mound of dust that used be known as The Monocle. Most villains fall in line, but The Rogues aren't most villains. The Rogues are The Flash's foes and have a type of code that sets them apart from most villains. No killing civilians or The Flash, no attacking The Flash's family, and no fighting one another. Captain Cold established these rules when he formed The Rogues as a way of keeping themselves clean and dignified, they were in it for the money. The Gotham freaks did it for laughs.
With The Justice League trapped it was up to Batman (because of course it was) and Catwoman to join Lex Luthor's anti-syndicate team, featuring Captain Cold. During our heroes (heroes?) attack on the Syndicate's HQ-which was the fallen Watchtower-Captain Cold fought Johnny Quick. Johnny assumed the fight would be over in a flash, he's a guy who can travel around the Earth in a matter of seconds and all Cap had was a pink ice-shooter. That sounded bad. Johnny pinned Cold to a wall and took the gun from his arms. What Johnny underestimated was that Cold knows his way around a cold gun. If Captain Cold were some small-shot he'd be iced. But when you've been firing, repairing, retrieving, and upgrading one weapon for your entire criminal career, you make sure to add a Plan B. Captain Cold's Plan B? Voice mode.
"Jingle Bells, Batman Smells" was the trigger-phrase that froze Johnny Quick's leg. And "Krrkssshhh" was the sound it made when Captain Cold kicked it off. Upon breaking his leg off, Cold mentions how he never could do such a thing to The Flash out of mutual respect. But Johnny? Well, like I said: He's not "the" Flash.
Thanks for reading!

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