Panel Biter Podcasts

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

The Big DC 50 (Part 3)

Short version: there are too many Batman and Batman-related movies and DC Comics literally a million other ideas. So I'm writing about 50 of em'! Here's part three of me blabbering about all the other things Warner and DC could do with their franchises!

Hawk & Dove
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Hawk and Dove are two superpowered siblings-either brothers or a brother and sister-who differ in politics. Hawk believes violence is the faster, easier solution to problems. That force will always change things. That war is the answer. Dove believes in non-violence, in conversation, he/she believes that any dispute can be solved without violence. The potency of these character's themes is timeless, they present the idea that two sides of the same coin can work together. Some problems can't be solved with words, some problems can't be solved with fists. You can draw all the liberal/republican parallel's you want, the message is that if two people want the same thing they don't have to argue to get it.

The Hellblazer
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John Constantine, he's a magic detective, he's a conman, he's clever and weird and walks the gray line. You already tried to make a movie about him, you have a really good-criminally cancelled-TV show to reference from. He's different, he's not the typical comic book hero. And you have the entire mystical side of the DCU to use, all the Vertigo material. Make a dark comedy, make a horror-detective film. Do something with this golden bastard!

The Inferior Five
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Just do this. Just this. I did all the work for you.
https://panelbiter.podbean.com/e/the-panel-pitch-the-inferior-five/

Jonah Hex
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Westerns are easy to make, despite the fact that you f$#ked him up before. Ignore your past mistake, make a badass western film with a tough-as-nails outlaw. Hell, throw him through time if a Western is too boring for you. Put some actual DC villain in there like Vandal Savage, he's an immortal bastard he'd make a great antagonist to Jonah Hex. Use Ra's al Ghul if you can't go one movie without something Batman related.

The Justice Society of America
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Okay, I'm passionate about this one. Three words: Retro, super-science, World War II. Without the American public knowing the U.S. recruited a few young scientists to form a super-team to help defeat Nazi Germany. Doctor Midnight, Hourman, and Sandman, three science-oriented heroes. Toss The Spectre, Wildcat, leave Flash and Green Lantern out to save people on confusion, maybe gender-bend Johnny Thunder because nobody will care. Just a fun, "Rocketeer" kind of superhero film. Take your Golden Age characters and bring them into the modern age, this will lay the ground work for Justice League.

Kamandi
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A post-apocalyptic adventure film where the world is ruled by various animal-people tribes and we follow Kamandi, the last human. Think a more serious and grounded "Adventure Time" film. He's kind of like Tarzan too. And it would be in the far future so you can establish a Bat-Tribe of people who worship Batman like he's Jesus or something. To make it really authentic you can cast the Warner Bros executives as the Batman worshipers.

The Legion of Super-Heroes
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Another far future, but a good one. Imagine if the whole world was Metropolis. In this future we humans interbred with alien species across the cosmos so the members of The Legion of Superheroes all have powers via alien heritage. So they're the closest thing to mutants DC has. The stories can rip-off "Star Trek", while having "X-Men" drama and power-sets, and the number of characters would be steeping. Meaning your advertising and toy sales will skyrocket. Oh, and it's the future so they have a Superman memorial and Booster Gold can premier here and we can still have the religion of Batman. So don't worry.

Lobo 
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Zack Snyder directing, Tim Miller writing, and Jason Mamoa starring. Print. Done. It will sell like hotcakes! Lobo is a super-violent, super-vulgar bounty hunter who rides through space on a motorcycle. He loves dolphins, smoking and drinking and getting laid. He uses guns and missiles and bombs and a cool chain hook. He can hunt anyone in the DC Universe, you can explore the cosmic side of the universe. Oh, and there's a character called Space Cabbie who is a cab driver in space. You can stick him in there. Umm. Lobo hunted Santa Claus once. But, yeah, Snyder would love having a film where he can be as violent and gross and stupid as he wants to be.

The Martian Manhunter
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Remember him, DC Cinematic? He's the seventh member of The Justice League! He's got all of Superman's powers and more! He's the last of his kind, his human profession is detective, he's like all the cool parts of Batman and Superman combined. And his villains? White Martians, transforming aliens who are evil tyrants and can integrate into any society. Imagine, a detective hunting down certain individuals because they are actually killer aliens and he himself is an alien. That's a good mystery story, a decent science-fiction thriller. And between tense crime-noir moments you have epic superpowered alien battles. And he can manipulate people's minds so it'll be like he and the White Martians were never there. You can use Despero or Malefic too. Just do something with this underappreciated superhero and tell David S. Goyer to f$%k off.

The Metal Men
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The Metal Men are the six heroic robots created by Dr. Magnus to protect the innocent and such. Gold the ego-maniac, Platinum the caring den-mother, Lead the big, dumb bruiser, Iron the bro-dude, Mercury the salty wisecracker, and Tin the meek little brother. These robots really have fleshed out personalities and abilities. Magnus himself has been reworked as a young, passionate inventor who only wants the best for his robots. Pretty sure I saw these guys fight Chemo-the giant nuclear waste monster. There's a story there somewhere and it's got plenty of merchandising potential. Like, imagine Pinocchio, but with robots. And there are six of them. And you've already established Cyborg, a half-metal men.
More to come, thanks for reading!

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