The Event of The Century/Week

Event comics! We love em! We hate em! And they're never going away. Ever! For every claim from Marvel Comics about taking a few months off there are three world-changing events waiting around the corner. How else are DC and Marvel supposed to keep the lights on? Through Warner Bros. and Disney's endless money vault? Nah! While event comics have taken many shapes and forms and vary in quality they're usually two ways these events are published. And it's up to you to decide which is best this week on What's The Difference!?

Event Title

The "Event Title" style of event publishing is when a comic book company releases a new miniseries chronicling the main story of an event. Some examples include DC's Forever Evil, Darkest Night, Flashpoint, and Final Crisis, while Marvel's examples are Civil War, Secret Invasion, Secret Wars, and Secret Empire. An Event Title is usually six to twelve issues long, with each issue containing equal or more amounts of pages than a standard issue. Due to companies trying to convince readers how important these events are these events typically change or effect character or characters, this is what the company believes to be a reason for Event Titles costing more than a standard comic book issue. A typical comic book issue costs anywhere from 2.99 to 4.99, but a single issue of an event could cost up to 6.99, it's Trade-which is one book containing all the issues that make up the event-could cost up to fifty or sixty dollars depending on the importance and age of the event, while the first five issues of a book as a Trade could cost around fifteen or twenty dollars. From a marketing salespoint this type of publishing has worked even when the fanbase tires of events. Between 2016 and 2017, Marvel Comics had eight events including Doctor Doom rebuilding and resetting the Marvel Universe, another Civil War happening, and Captain America and HYDRA taking over the world. Despite fan outcry to stop event books from Marvel the books still sold. Unlike a "Crossover Event", an Event Title can have Tie-Ins. Tie-Ins are single or multiple issues of a comic book run that have something to do with the main event. For example: During "Civil War 2" the title "Power Man & Iron Fist" had a four issue story arc wearing the "Civil War 2" banner on it's covers, but the story barely included any material from the event and the event made no mention of this story arc. Essentially, these tie-ins could either be writers giving their own two-cents on the topic of the event or be an excuse for a writer to get lazy and let the event lead the issue.

Crossover Event

A "Crossover Event" is when two or more comic book series share a story between their issues, usually written and drawn by both series' teams of writers and artists. Some DC examples include: The Death of Superman, Night of The Monster Men, and The Lazarus Contract, and some Marvel examples are: Avengers Standoff, Age of Apocalypse, and Worlds Collide. Usually these types of stories are done to highlight the relationships of characters within the books, but it also done as a business strategy to get new readers. People may be reading Titans, but those same people aren't reading Teen Titans or Deathstroke, so if a story arc where to begin in Titans, but continue through Teen Titans and Deathstroke, readers would have to buy those other issues to read the rest of the arc. By the end the readers may be so entertained they begin reading two more comic book series! As for the structure, we'll be using DC Comic's "The Button" as an example. "The Button" is an arc taking place in issues of Batman, The Flash, Batman, and The Flash, in that order. The more books involved in the story the more wide spread it becomes. In the case of "Super-Sons of Tomorrow" that book took place in Superman, Super-Sons, Teen Titans, Superman, and finally Super-Sons. And in the case of Marvel's "Avengers Standoff" includes two special event issues, Agents of SHIELD, Uncanny Avengers, All-New All-Different Avengers, New Avengers, Howling Commandos of SHIELD, Captain America, Uncanny Avengers, New Avengers, Illuminati, Agents of SHIELD, All-New All-Different Avengers, New Avengers, Captain America, and another special issue. These issues are regularly priced, but profit off of multiple books being bought. Even for completionists these events are marketable because skipping a crossover event means missing an issue of a collection. So whether the event is well-received or not and whether or not a reader picks up the rest of the event they are still buying a single issue. While these types of events lack tie-ins they can sometimes come with extra issues that begin the arc without excluding people who don't read the book in which Part 1 takes place in. "Avengers Standoff" and "Robin War" both had special issues described as prologues and epilogues for this purpose and, as often done, they are priced higher than the single issues.

Between the two types of events there is a lesser, more uncommon type of event we'll call "Single Issue Event" which primarily includes "The Clone Saga" a story arc from Spider-Man that claimed it was an event for the entire year that it ran.

If I personally had to choose one type of event over the other it would be the Event Title. I enjoy a good crossover, but for someone like me who is so picky with what he reads it only takes more money out of my wallet to read a really good story in a book I don't want to invest in. An Event Title is self-contained, and doesn't require me to read anything else. Even it's Tie-Ins are inconsequential and just slow down the books I am reading at the most. And if an event isn't amazing I at least know it's only six issues, or I know I can buy it all at once in the near future. The other perk is that whether is shakes things up or not, event books usually effect a character instead of spinning off new titles. Regardless, those are my reasons for choosing Event Titles over Crossover Events. If you have a different opinion make sure to comment down below!

Thanks for reading!

Kori Facts

Are you a fan of The Princess of Tamaran? Well, we got One Dozen Starfire Facts!

1. Marv Wolfman and George Perez created Starfire in 1980 in "DC Comics Presents #26" and featured in their series "The New Teen Titans" later the same year, but before her there were other characters named Starfire. This included Leonid Kovar in 1968 who changed his codename to Red Star after meeting The Teen Titans years later. A crime lord appearing in "Supergirl" back in 1971 used the name Starfire. And in 1976, DC Comics published an eight-issue series about a character named Starfire who was an alien woman who escaped slavery and led an army of rebel aliens to free her planet from servitude. Due to her character and origins she was likely Marv and George's main source of inspiration behind the modern Starfire.

2. The other half of inspiration came from Red Sonja, a character created in the Marvel title "Conan The Barbarian" who spun-off into her own success.

3. Starfire's best known relationship has been with Dick Grayson/Nightwing. The two worked together on the 1980 Teen Titans and developed a romantic relationship while Dick was still Robin. In some stories she even learned English by kissing him. The two almost got married, but the wedding was interrupted by Raven (who was corrupted by Trigon). After that, the two feared they rushed into marriage. They never tried again, and held relationships multiple times since. In the alternate future of "Kingdom Come" Starfire married Dick Grayson (Red Robin in this future) and they have a daughter Mar'i Grayson, the Teen Titan known as Nightstar. And in the alternate future of "Nightwing: The New Order" Starfire had married Dick, but left to lead her people on New Tamaran. The two have a child named Jake Grayson who has his mother's powers.

4. Starfire has been married two times, both men were Tamaraneans. The first was Prince Karras who she married as part of a peace treaty and he died in battle. The second was General Phy'zzon who she married out of love, he was killed by The Sun Eater. She also had brief relationships with Captain Comet, Red Hood/Jason Todd, and Arsenal/Roy Harper.

5. During the series "52", Starfire helped Animal Man and Adam Strange investigate an alien parasite. The group ran into the Bounty Hunter Lobo. Lobo and Starfire speak privately and Lobo rips Starfire's top off. Starfire offers to pay Lobo for his help finding the source of the parasites. Adam, Starfire, and Lobo would all go on to be temporary members of the team REBELS.

6. Starfire is not only a veteran Teen Titan, she was also a mentor during the time when The Teen Titans and Young Justice teams combined, she is a reserve member of The Justice League, she was on Nightwing's Outsiders, Red Hood's Outlaws, and the aforementioned REBELS.

7. As a Tamaranean, Koriand'r has super strength, super speed, enhanced durability, immunity to most poisons, and the ability to fly. She can fly at supersonic speeds, and her strength rivals that of Wonder Woman's sidekick Donna Troy. Her strength and speed can be further pushed by intense rage, this rage boost allowed her to free herself from the restraint of both Donna Troy-who is almost as strong as Wonder Woman-and Mon-El-who is almost as strong as Superman. She can also learn any language via skin contact-preferably lip contact-and has a prehensile tongue. Her projectile powers are a different story, they are an ability only she and her sister have. These powers were granted to her by The Psions, a race of aliens who enslaved The Tamaraneans. They treated Kori like a servant, a worker, an escort, and as a test subject. Experimentation gave Starfire the ability to convert absorbed radiation into "star-bolts". These can be fired from her hands, eyes, and even as an area-wide blast which renders her weaker. This radiation-based power also allows her to melt objects on contact-even steel-and she can drain radiation from any source. She has even used this power to drain solar radiation from Superman in an attempt to weaken him.

8. Starfire's older sister Komand'r/Blackfire grew up with a defect that prevented her from flying. This defect also meant she could never take the throne as Queen of Tamaran. Out of jealousy she grew to hate her sister and use the powers given to her by the Psions to attack Starfire for most of her adult life. Her evil stems from childhood neglect and torture, and she has tangled with the likes of The Teen Titans, Hawkman and Hawkgirl, The REBELS, and The Outsiders.

9. Starfire has always been portrayed as a sexual character, but in a mostly positive light. She encouraged young women to embrace their sexuality and express their pride in womanhood. She was perky, flirtatious, sympathetic, and friendly. Her sexualiy was also counterbalanced by her good nature and curiosity, often misquoting or misunderstanding the meaning of Earthly metaphors and customs. However, DC Comics received major flack when premiering her in "Red Hood & The Outlaws" during the New 52 reboot in 2011. Starfire was presented as a sex hobbyist, hooking up with both of her teammates Jason Todd/Red Hood and Roy Harper/Arsenal out of sheer pleasure and without any romantic feelings. She generally cold towards other people, acting more like a warrior woman than an actual person. Her relationship with Dick Grayson apparently fell apart and her history with The Teen Titans was erased. All these choices were made by writer and artist Rob Liefeld, a 1990's artist who was part of the 90's esthetic and sensibilities. Or lack thereof. It wasn't until her short-lived solo series in 2015 written by Jimmy Palmiotti and drawn by Amanda Conner that the character was respected once again. Jimmy and Amanda are a married couple who have worked on All-Star Western, Power Girl, and Harley Quinn and her multiple spin-off books. Currently, Starfire is on The Teen Titans and, after Damian Wayne/Robin proved himself to be ineffective leader, Starfire has taken the role of leader.

10. When Starfire wasn't living at Titans Tower or at Dick Grayson's apartment, she spent some time living with The Baker Family: Buddy/Animal Man, Ellen, and their son Cliff. After their adventure with Adam Strange, Buddy offers Starfire to stay with his family until her powers fully return. She could babysit Cliff after he gets home from school. This causes some problems in The Baker household as Ellen accuses Buddy of loving Starfire romantically, which Buddy does not confirm or deny. Cliff also comes home one to day to see Starfire laying naked in the pool trying to absorb more solar rays.

11. Just as intense rage can increase her strength, Starfire's emotions can affect her powers further. When a Tamaranean feels an emotion they feel it completely, there is no mix of emotions or sudden shift. Her positive attitude gives Starfire full use of her powers, her rage increases the lethality of her powers, and sadness can disable her powers completely until she is happy again.

12. Starfire and Blackfire have a younger brother named Ryand'r. Due to his sister's being great warriors, he did not aspire to be a warrior or a politician, instead becoming an amature scientist. His understanding of science was the factor that convinced the character Primus into recruiting Ryand'r onto his team called The Omega Men. While on this team, Ryand'r was captured and experimented by Psions, but instead of gaining the projectile powers of his sisters he gained the ability to make his hands hot enough to melt any surface and fly. While only appearing occasionally, he has gone by the name Darkfire.
Thanks for reading.

TOT: Alfred & Bane's Prison Break

Remember that one time Alfred teamed up with Bane?

Alfred Pennyworth probably has the roughest life of any fictional butler. He has to not only allowed his master-who he has known and raised for over thirty years of his life-dress up in armor and go fight criminals and deranged people, but he also has to help, equip, and coordinate his master, his master's allies and children, and do so while building and producing weapons, armors, and vehicles of military-grade status. All while cleaning up bat shit. I think most people acknowledge Alfred's awesomeness just out of sheer respect for his dedication. But a lot of people like to call him a badass for the badass things he's done. More than anything I have seen three examples constantly brought up:
1. That time he beat Superman to a pulp and saved Batman.
2. That time he shot The Penguin out of a window and saved Batman.
And 3. That time he used a shotgun to blast a hole through The Predator and saved Batman.
Those are all badass moments Alfred has had, but when it comes to "That One Time" I tend to stick to canon stories. And before any of you get cute and say "isn't multiverse part of the canon", you know what I mean:
1. Alfred beat up Superman in the "Injustice: Gods Among Us" comic series, which took place in the same universe as the fighting game.
2. Alfred shooting The Penguin happened in "Batman: Earth One" another story taking place on an alternate Earth.
And 3. If you really think "Batman vs Predator" is canon, you have your wires crossed.
So how about I talk about an Alfred moment that is both canon and badass? Because quite a few of those exist.
In 2014, Scott Snyder, Tim Seeley, James Tynion and a number of other writers wrote a weekly Batman series called "Batman Eternal". I won't get into the nitty-gritty, but part of the story involved Alfred getting hit with Fear Toxin by the villain Hush. Hush then disguises himself as a doctor and brings Alfred to Arkham Asylum-which had been taken over by the inmates. Around that time the villains Deacon Blackfire and The Joker's Daughter (don't believe her) were trying to perform a ritual underneath Arkham, but they were stopped by Batwing and The Spectre. The resulting explosion caused Arkham to collapse.
This resulted in "Batman Eternal #31" where Alfred barely survives his injures and fights back the effects of his fear toxin to help Bane escape the wreckage. While they are in no way friends, Alfred tries to appeal to Bane's need of backup. Someone to walk behind him in case some prisoner tries to sneak attack him. Bane, as well, acknowledges Alfred's usefulness as both as medical expert and a military combatant. The two muscle their through destroyed walls and injured criminals, watching each other's backs along the way. They finally make it to a wall where Alfred speaks some kind of code. Before Bane can figure out what Alfred is saying, the voice-activated defense systems of Batman's underground HQ activate and spray Bane with knock-out gas. Bane is out cold while Alfred walks into the open wall, in front of the computer system, and lets Batman and friends know he's back and ready to help coordinate them throughout Gotham City.
The issue this happens in is the same issue where Batman confronts The Joker's Daughter so while this little adventure doesn't last long, it still carries the effectiveness Alfred is known to have. Alfred was in The Royal Air Force, he was a medic, he's trained in hand-to-hand, and he's proficient with firearms. He's also a skilled Stage Actor and can read people quite well, which is how he was able to get on Bane's good graces by playing lackey. What I also like about this story is Bane's characterization. He takes to having a minion so quickly and overlooks Alfred's true intentions. What makes it even funnier is that Bane openly recognizes Alfred's fighting skills, but doesn't factor in that Alfred is playing him. That while Alfred has been aiding Bane through this destroyed building, it's actually been Alfred using Bane all along.
In plenty of modern stories writers have written Bane to be a crooked mirror to Batman. They grew up as literal opposites, but both became men of extreme capabilities, intelligence, and ethical code. Bane just takes his code in a different direction. And since Alfred has been dealing with Batman for a very long time, and sometimes even calling the shots despite Bruce's insistence, it's likely Alfred is used to talking men smarter and stronger than him into doing something they don't intend to. Alfred may be a butler, but sometimes he leaves the serving to someone else.
Thanks for reading.

Green Lantern's Plight

You know you're living in an alternate universe when Aquaman and Cyborg are getting movies before Green Lantern. It seems like DC and Warner Bros are really hesitant on making another Green Lantern movie, so hesitant he wasn't even in the Justice League film. But why? Well, the answer may not surprise you.

The 2011 "Green Lantern" film is still a sensitive spot for a lot of DC Fans. For as much as flicks like "Jonah Hex" and "Catwoman" bombed, this film hurt the most and still hurts to this day. It's not even dumb funny it's just dumb. It's cliche, generic, it's CGI is atrocious, and it failed to capture the imagination of the comics. Because of this film the good ol' Emerald Knight has gotten a bad reputation among movie-goers, even Warner Bros studios identifies how much of a sore spot that film was. The only Green Lantern seen in "Justice League" was an unnamed alien killed off in a flashback, that's how much they want to cover up the character. Apparently we're getting "Lethal Weapon in space" with 2020's "Green Lantern Corps" with such names as Geoff Johns, Justin Rhodes, and David S. Goyer (fuck that guy) connected to it. If you ask me that's a bit of wait. We're supposedly getting an Aquaman, Shazam, Wonder Woman sequel, and Cyborg movie before this one and that seems unfair. I mean, it kinda makes sense to not include GL in "Justice League" just because his movie and his adventures are so far removed from what's going on on Earth. And if it's really going to be a space cop film than GOOD! If you've read my "Green Lantern" movie pitch you'll now that's exactly what I would do, but my concern is the same concern I have with every DC movie right now: how will Warner Bros fuck it up? 

What will they change, who will they regrettably cast? You gotta remember the only two decent films released by Warner at this point are "Wonder Woman" and "Justice League" and that's only because one movie had a director with total control and the other only had Zack Snyder for half it's production. That automatically made the film better than "Man of Steel". Maybe I shouldn't worry. I mean, after what Martin Campbell did to the last GL movie I should count my blessings. Who knows? That movie being garbage might make this movie better by comparison. Or in two years we may find ourselves struggling to decide which film is worse.

But why do I are so much? This isn't Nightwing or Shazam, right? Well, while Green Lantern isn't my favorite series I still recognize how important of a series it is. As decades went by the sheer magnitude of their lore and importance to the DC cosmos grew, and they became vital to the universe. There was a story called "Blackest Night" where every DC Comic's character who was/or had been dead becomes a Black Lantern Zombie and attacks the living. That wasn't a Batman-triggered event or a Superman-triggered event, that was a Green Lantern-triggered event. If it weren't for that story than Flash might not of headlined the event "Flashpoint" and Aquaman might not of headlined "Throne of Atlantis". We all owe writer Geoff Johns a boat load of respect for pushing Green Lantern the way he did.

Six 3-dimensional people have been Earth's Green Lantern, there are at least five alien Green Lanterns who are interesting in their own right, and there are six other Lantern Corps made up of different colors and emotions. Granted, my one complaint with Green Lantern and maybe GL Fans is the obsession with categorizing and highlighting the different types of Lantern Corps, but I'll get to that some other time. Other than the other Corps, you have The Manhunters (soulless robots who were the police force of the galaxy before the GLC was founded), Evil Star (an alien scientist who's unique weapon can rival a Power Ring AND create minions), The Weaponers of Qward (who's material can actual destroy Power Rings) and Krona (one of The Guardians of The Universe who went rogue and became a mad scientist). The Lanterns can create ANYTHING you can imagine! Even Kryptonite and alien weapons and people and elements and stuff! There's so much to work with that a second attempt at a Green Lantern film, especially with Johns involved cannot be as bad as the first one. But, then again, even "Man of Steel" managed to make a mess out of gold.

Thanks for reading.

Lex Facts

Are you a fan of the smartest man on Earth? Well, we got One Dozen Lex Luthor Facts for you!

1. While Superman has remained a lasting symbol of hope and truth, Lex Luthor's designs and character have evolved over the years as writers modernized his evil intentions. In the 1940's Lex was a mad scientist because American culture hadn't known a lot about science and so writers could use this unknown source of knowledge as a potential threat to humanity. In the 80's Lex became the corporate capitalist in a suit and tie we know him as today, focusing on the corrupt big-business company owners who "run the world" today. Even during the Bush Administration when the American people doubted his skills as a leader, Lex Luthor had become President of The United States in the DCU for about a year. Showing his brand of corruption and involvement could not be interrupted even by Superman.

2. While the modern Lex Luthor went bald as a personal choice, early versions of Lex had a lot of orange hair. The original story behind his baldness was an incident when he was a teenager working with chemicals that caused a fire in his school lab. Superman-as a teen-used his super breath to put out the fire, but the mixture of wind pressure and chemicals caused Lex's hair to fly off and never return. Other versions stated Lex's early exposure to Kryptonite resulted in radiation making his hair fall out.

3. Lex Luthor was a founding member of The Injustice League, as well as spin-off groups like The Injustice Gang and The Secret Society of Super-Villains. In animated form he was also the leader of The Legion of Doom. Only a few years ago was Luthor a member of The Justice League. This happened after he helped save the world from an evil Justice League in "Forever Evil" and used Batman's secret identity as leverage. He even entered a brief partnership with Superman after another version of Superman died and Lex felt he had to take his place. As the new Superman, Lex wore a power armor similar to his usual one, but with a Superman color scheme and the cape of the last Superman. Recently though he has returned to being a villain.

4. From the same Earth as the evil Justice League (The Crime Syndicate) there came Alexander Luthor Junior, that world's version of Lex Luthor. That version of Lex was much more heroic, but in a paranoid way. He had red hair and gold armor. After becoming locked in a paradise dimension with two alternate versions of Superman and an alternate version of Lois Lane, Lex watched the DCU become darker and fail more, so he manipulated events that led to the event "Infinite Crisis". This version of Lex also secret led a team called The Secret Six, but was later murdered by The Joker.

5. In the 1990's, Lex Luthor faked his death in an airplane accident so he could secretly remove his own brain and put it in a clone body. He did this because his own body was dying from Kryptonite exposure and he needed a new body to live. When he returned in a clone body he was younger and had red hair again, now going by Alexander Luthor II. He told the public he was Lex's bastard son come to take over the family business. This wouldn't be the first time Lex dealt with clones as the organization Cadmus created a clone of Superman, but they needed human DNA for the project to be a success. This resulted in Connor Kent/Superboy having DNA from Superman and Lex Luthor. Some versions of Bizarro Superman are also clones created by Lex Luthor.

6. Luthor's clone body eventually degenerates like his old one and the lie about him was revealed by Lois Lane and Superman, leaving Lex locked up and dying. To save himself he made a deal with the demon Neron, his soul in exchange for perfect health. Lex didn't believe in souls. He then made up a lie about being replaced by red-haired clone while he was locked up in Cadmus Labs.

7. During his red-haired period Lex shaked up with Matrix/Supergirl. This version of Supergirl came from a world where Superman died and an invasion of evil Kryptonians inspired that world's Lex Luthor to create an artificial human from protoplasm and model her into Supergirl. That world was destroyed, but that Supergirl came into the main DCU and fell in love with Lex Luthor.

8. In some stories Lex has claimed to have cured cancer and AIDS, but hasn't released the cure as he is waiting for their value to build up. During his time on The Justice League, Superman challenged Lex to create a cure for cancer on the spot when a virus began plaguing Metropolis.

9. In the New 52 we saw another version of Alexander Luthor Jr from Earth 3 who had the powers of Shazam was known as Mazahs, an insane and dangerous anti-hero. On Earth C-populated by animal versions of characters-there lives Lex Lemur the archenemy of Super Squirrel. In "Multiversity" Alexis Luthor is the daughter of a deceased Lex Luthor and she is "involved" with Damian Wayne/Batman. On Earth 50, Lex becomes President and murders Wally West/The Flash. This-in turn-makes Superman kill Lex and usher in the tyrannical leadership of The Justice Lords. In Frank Millar's "The Dark Knight Strikes Again" which takes place in the future, Lex Luthor and Brainiac puppeteer a hologram President and lead a lawful strike on superpowered people, as well as controlling Superman via holding the Bottled City of Kandor hostage. In the world of "Kingdom Come"-another story in the future-Lex runs a team called The Mankind Liberation Front to protect people from superheroes, he also uses mind-controlling worms to control Shazam. In "Superman: Red Son" where Superman landed in Russia instead of Kansas, Lex is a scientist who eventually marries Lois Lane and becomes President. While Lois divorces him, Lex convinces the communist Superman that he is stripping humanity of their freedom. Superman fakes his death and hides among society as Clark Kent while Lex leads the free world into the future. A millenia in the future Earth becomes planet Krypton and-nearing planetary destruction-sends Kal-El into space, through a black hole, and he ends up back in time to land in Russia again.

10. During his time as President, Lex had Amanda Waller (founder of The Suicide Squad) as his Secretary of Metahuman Affairs, Pete Ross (Superman's childhood friend) as his Vice President, Sam Lane (Lois Lane's father) as his Secretary of Defense, Jefferson Pierce (the hero Black Lightning) as The Secretary of Education, and Frank Rock as Chairman of Chief Joints of Staff. Frank Rock was also known as Sgt. Rock, DC Comic's best known war hero from World War II. It is unknown whether this Sgt. Rock was a clone or a robot or time displaced, but DC Comics insists Sgt. Rock died back in 1945. During his running he also framed Bruce Wayne for murder. As President he labeled Superman and Batman as criminals because a giant meteor of Kryptonite was heading towards Earth and Lex blamed Superman. 

11. In 2006, Lex started The Everyman Project and Infinity Inc. The project was to give superpowers to everyday citizens by genetic experiments and Infinity Inc was a team of those people. One member of the team was Steel's niece, Natasha Irons. After superpowered people start losing their powers and falling out of the sky, Steel and Natasha learn it was all a distraction so Lex could create metagenes equal to Superman and inject himself with them. With Superman level strength Lex couldn't be defeated, but Natasha managed to deactivate the genes long enough for Steel to defeat Lex.

12. During "Blackest Night", Lex Luthor receives an Orange Power Ring sent by The Guardians of The Universe, who send one of each Power Ring to Earth to assign deputies to battle the Black Lantern Zombies. Lex's Orange Ring is fueled by Avarice/Greed and he uses it to construct battle armor and destroy Black Lantern zombies off all the people he has murdered, including his own father. The Orange Ring also allows the user to create light construct slaves of the people the user has killed and Lex uses those slaves to battle Black Lantern Superman and Superboy and battle Larfleeze-the only member of The Orange Lantern Corps-himself. He also tries to steal the Yellow Ring of Fear from Scarecrow and the Red Ring of Rage from Mera, but Blue Lantern Flash, Indigo Lantern Atom, and Violent Lantern Wonder Woman stop him. When ensnared by Wonder Woman's Lasso of Truth, Lex reveals he wants to be Superman.

Thanks for reading!

TOT: Punisher Punched a Polar Bear

Anyone else remember that one time The Punisher punched a Polar Bear?

Fun Fact: Tim Burton almost made a Superman movie with a scene of Superman wrestling a polar bear to convey to the audience how strong he was. But today we're hear to talk about the exact opposite of Superman-not Bizarro, General Zod, or Superboy Prime-The Punisher, Marvel's most "anti" anti-hero. Following a disappointing story in which Frank Castle died, became an angel of Death, and then was fired so hard he got to see his dead family in Heaven and then got sent back to the land of the living, Marvel Comics got Garth Ennis-the man behind "Preacher"-to write The Punisher in the year 2000. Ennis brought the kind of sadistic, disgusting violence Frank had been missing for the past few years. Early in Ennis' run on the book he introduced The Gnucci Family, one of the toughest crime families in New York City. Punisher's return to the NYC community is represented by him killing the three sons of The Gnucci Family, prompting the family's head-Ma Gnucci-into taking action. Take notes, by the way. This may be Season Two of that Netflix series. Ma Gnucci begins a manhunt for Punisher, hiring mercenaries like The Russian (who Frank kills with hot pizza and his fat neighbor) and blackmailing the NYPD into building a Punisher Task Force (consisting of two people).

Ma Gnucci and her bodyguards find and chase The Punisher when they see him spying on them and they run into Central Park Zoo. When Punisher dives into a pit holding a Polar Bear he plans on using it to attack Gnucci and her last guard, but as Punisher puts it "Cuddly. Lovable. Docile. That won't do at all". Frank Castle-The Punisher-delivers a straight right hook into the polar bear's jaw. With the poor endangered animal significantly "triggered", Frank crawls out of the pit and throws Gnucci and her guard in. The guard is killed, but Ma Gnucci miraculously survived thanks to police pulling her out. She lost her scalp and all her limbs, but she survived.

An issue later Punisher goes to Gnucci's mansion to finish the job and finds her limbless body on a bed. Frank sets the mansion on fire leaving her to burn inside. But like I said, she's a survivor. Ma Gnucci-using all her strength-leaps out of the window at Punisher who stands outside the building. And Frank Castle-The Punisher-punts the limbless bitch back into the burning house where she dies. She died as she lived, screaming at other people.

So the next time you want to mess with The Punisher. Oh, let's be real. If you're stupid enough to f$&# with Frank Castle you're probably too dumb to read this.

To all you not-dumbies, thanks for reading! 

The War of Dark Knights

Anyone remember "Spider-Man: Shattered Dimensions"? It was this video game where you played as four Spider-Men from different realities. It was really neat, so neat it got a crappy sequel and was the inspiration for the event "Spiderverse". And while it would be easy to pitch a better-more fleshed out sequel-to that game, it's kind of pointless when most Spider-Men are the same. Maybe they're different people, but they all do the same thing. That's why today I wanted to Pitch a similar concept with four drastically different versions of everyone's favorite Dark Knight. This is "Batman: Arkham Realities".

Obviously, I'd like Rocksteady games to come back and make this game. Sure they were finished with Batman, but the appeal of making four different play styles with an off-the-wall story could get them back on. I chose these four Batman because they all come from very different universes, all fight in very different styles-which means playstyles-and are all different people. I chose four because it's not too little and not too much. The four Batmen are Bruce Wayne from the Arkham video games, Thomas Wayne from the Flashpoint universe, Terry McGinnis from the alternate future of "Batman Beyond", and Kal-El/Bruce Wayne from the Elseworld's story "Batman: Speeding Bullets". If you're disappointed the 1960's Adam West Batman wasn't part of this I felt his passing would have hindered the game. I'd feel bad getting an imitator. Besides I'd rather he get a free arcade style beat-em-up with Batman and Robin from the 60's show added to the game.

Anyway, the story goes that the Bat Demon God Barbatos-a real character-fears a prophecy that four Batmen from specific universes will stop his plans of Multiversal conquest. He sends his Dark Knights-corrupted versions of Bruce Wayne-to each universe to kill those Batmen. Overhearing this plan is Bat-Mite, Batman's biggest fan from the 5th Dimension. He acts as the guide to the Batmen and a way each Batman can communicate throughout dimensions.

Arkham

At the end of "Batman: Arkham Knight", the world knows who Batman is, Bruce fakes his death, and uses Scarecrow's fear toxin on the criminals of Gotham to make them think The Batman still protects the streets, even though he has retired. When we see Bruce he is living in a large cabin in the forest beyond Gotham with Alfred. He is convinced by Bat-Mite to come out of retirement and help stop The Dark Knights. His gameplay is exactly like it was in the other games, with the exception being his gadgets. Before every level, the player can select three out of eight gadgets to bring on the mission. These gadgets can be used for puzzle solving or finding alternate routes or just for different ways of fighting. Maybe the gadgets can be upgraded over time. The only Dark Knight he'd battle would be The Batman Who Laughs, a Batman who went mad from Joker Venom. He controls an army of corrupt Robins and wields power-enhancing playing cards. He uses the likes of Harley Quinn, his lead Robin-Jason Todd, a revived Scarecrow, Ra's al Ghul, and a revived Joker to lead Batman down a dark path. By the end of the journey Bruce Wayne learns to forgive himself and-due to plot-The Joker is revived as a sane man. This allows Bruce and Joker to start over as new men. He is voiced by Kevin Conroy.

Flashpoint

Thomas Wayne exists in a world caught between a war between the Atlanteans and The Amazonians, and where his son his dead and his wife is The Joker. It is in his world where The Drowned (a female Bruce Wayne who has Atlantean powers) and The Merciless (a version of Bruce Wayne who became a corrupted God of War) invade their respective kingdoms. Thomas' gameplay is gun-based. A lot of rolling and dodging and shooting. Each level would start with him with handguns, but he'll have to get more ammo and use different guns in each level. These Dark Knights sick the likes of the serial killer Plastic Man, the pirate Deathstroke, Aquaman the war tyrant, Wonder Woman the warrior queen, and a battle-equip Martha/Joker on him. By the end, this Batman would have a last conversation with his adult son, giving him closure and the courage to fight this war head-on. He is voiced by Bruce Greenwood.

Beyond

In this alternate future, Terry McGinnis is trying to balance his upcoming marriage to his girlfriend Dana with his responsibilities as Batman. Still guided by the old Bruce Wayne, Terry has to protect his fiance and his family from the likes of The Dark Knights, The Dawnbreaker (a teenaged Bruce Wayne who became a corrupt Green Lantern) and The Murder Machine (a version of Bruce who fused with Cyborg and formed an artificial intelligence). This Batman fights like a character out of "Devil May Cry" or "God of War". His cybernetic suit gives him enhanced strength and speed, he can fly, fire discs and Batarangs, his systems can also hack technology. Between levels, the player can use gained experience points to upgrade different parts of Terry's suit like strength, speed, defense, projectile weapons, and hacking technology. The pros and cons of this Batman depend on the player. Along with Dawnbreaker and Murder Machine this Batman will fight the future version of Mr. Freeze, Shriek, Spellbinder, Big Time, and even Tim Drake/Joker. By the end he and Dana sit down and talk about his career as Batman and what it means for their future. He is voiced by Will Friedle.

Speeding Bullets

In this alternate universe, Kal-El's spaceship landed in Gotham City and he was raised by the Wayne Family as Bruce Wayne. After the death of his parents and the emergence of his powers he swore vengeance and became Batman. His world is invaded by The Red Death (a version of Bruce Wayne who possessed The Flash's body using The Speed Force) and The Devastator (a version of Bruce Wayne who transformed himself with a Doomsday-like monster to stop a corrupt Superman). This Batman has the powers of Superman, meaning he has a button for various heat vision attacks and a button for breath-based attacks. Certain enemies can only be defeated by different powers, it's more over-the-top action than Batman Beyond. The main gameplay component is sunlight. By using his heat vision or super breath or regenerating health Batman will use up energy from a meter. When the meter goes to zero he can't use his powers or regenerate health, by finding small amounts of sunlight he can gain energy back. In order to stop the world from becoming populated by Doomsday monsters he'll have to fight Professor Bane (Bane + Emil Hamilton), Lex "Joker" Luthor, Batzarro, and Killer Nat (Killer Croc + Parasite). By the end he'll cure the world and realize the people of Earth need to see him as a symbol of hope and not fear, so he becomes Superman. He is voiced by George Newbern.

Those are just some of my ideas regarding multiversal Batmen and how a video game featuring them could work! Hope you liked it!

Thanks for reading!

Nova Facts

Are you a fan of The Human Rocket? Well, we got One Dozen Nova Facts!

1. Unlike most Marvel superheroes from his era, Richard Rider became a superhero when he was a teenager. And unlike most superheroes, Rider was allowed to age into an adult. Fittingly, his successor Sam Alexander is also a teenage superhero.

2. Rider and Alexander are part of a galactic police department called The Nova Corps. Unlike their DC Comic's counterparts-The Green Lantern Corps-The Nova Corps work under a rank system. From least ranked to highest ranked it goes: Corpsmen, Millennians, Denarians, and Centurions. Above all four also include The Syfon Warriors who have the special ability of draining and redicting energy. And at the highest position is Nova Prime, the strongest Nova member. Richard Rider has held the title of Nova Prime.

3. The Nova Corps members gain powers by wearing their signature helmets which materialize their costumes and give them powers. Their powers come from The Nova Force-a collection of living computers on planet Xandar. These powers include super strength and durability, flight, universal communication, breathing underwater and in space, energy projection, telekinesis, and enough speed to fly through solid metal. The amount of power you gain from The Nova Force depends on your ranking. Corpsmen may have the non-violent abilities, Denarians are the first rank that can fly, and The Nova Prime has full access to The Nova Force.

4. The reason Sam Alexander's helmet is black instead of being gold is because his father was a Centurion, but a "dirty" one. His dad was part of a unit of Novas who were corrupt equal to that of corrupt police officers. As such, their unit wore black helmets. In "Ultimate Spider-Man" the TV show, Sam Alexander is Nova, part of Spider-Man's supporting cast, and wears a standard Nova helmet.

5. Despite Gamora's relationship with Star-Lord in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, in the Marvel Comics Universe she and Richard Rider have a long-standing romantic relationship.

6. One of Nova's creators Marv Wolfman sued Marvel in 1997 for ownership of characters he's created for the company including Nova, Blade, and others. He lost the case in 2000.

7. Richard Rider was a founding member of the New Warriors in 1989 under the name "Kid Nova" alongside Speedball, Firestar, Justice, Night Thrasher, and Namorita. He left the team shortly before The New Warriors starred in a reality TV show and accidently caused Marvel's Civil War by causing civilians to die in a battle. Rider has also been a member of The Defenders and The Secret Avengers. His successor Sam was a founding member of the most recent New Warriors team as well as the newest version of The Champions and the Avengers for a short time.

8. During "Civil War", Richard was a main player in the cosmic event "Annihilation" in which the ruler of The Negative Zone, Annihilus, sent an armada of war ships across the galaxy. It was this event that sparked Rider's relationship with Gamora, and also created the modern version of The Guardians of The Galaxy.

9. Ego The Living Planet once used brainwashing to fool The Nova Corps into letting him join and use the Nova Force. Rider was unaffected and protested about it only to be stripped of his rank and thrown out. Rider borrowed The Quantum Bands from Wendell Vaughn/Quasar and became Quasar for a short time. He teleported beings known as The Mindless Ones inside of Ego, causing him great psychic pain. Ego retreated and Rider was given his ranking back.

10. One of Richard Rider's closest allies is Cosmo The Spacedog. Cosmo was a Russian dog sent into space as part of a program, but he got lost and became a space explorer. Due to cosmic rays Cosmo gained higher intelligence and multiple psychic abilities. He has helped Nova on multiple occasions and has been a member of The Guardians of The Galaxy.

11. In Issue #15 of "What If?", we see four what if stories where a homeless man, a young widow, a criminal, and Peter Parker become Nova. During "Secret Wars" in 2015, there was a miniseries called "Infinity Gauntlet" where we see a version of Xander that is a wasteland failed by The Nova Corps. A family of four and their pet dog become a team of Novas and secure the Infinity Gems from Thanos.

12. Richard Rider was also a key member of the event "The Thanos Imperative" in which Nova, The Silver Surfer, The Guardians of The Galaxy and others discover "The Cancerverse".In this reality, Death has no presence so life spread throughout the galaxy without cease. This overpopulation leads to the reality's ruler-an alternate version of Captain Marvel-to spread his realities' plague throughout all universes so that no universe would fear death. By the end, Richard is kept within the Cancerverse which is near to destruction, only to escape in 2017.

Thanks for reading.

Not Another Pitch Series (X-Men Edition)

So, it's finally happened. The X-Men movie rights are back in the hands of Marvel and now everyone's favorite mutants can join the other heroes of The Marvel Cinematic Universe! Well, seeing the opportunity in front of me, I've decided to tell you loyal readers what my plan for an MCU X-Men would look like! I won't be doing movie pitches every week, and I only have about four X-Men related properties to have films. Characters like Wolverine and Deadpool and the team Weapon X will get their own posts down the line in regards to how Disney/Marvel should handle them, but for now I want to talk about the prequel series that would come out before my ideal X-Men Film.

First and foremost, where have the mutants been? Well, it's quite simple. Mutants have always been in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Good mutants helping people in need of help, bad mutants causing destruction, the X-Men themselves have been around since the first Avengers film. But they have a certain psychic on their side. Yes, using Cerebro, Professor X has used his telepathy to keep mutants hidden from public knowledge. Hiding and twisting the world's memories of mutants to a point where people never learned of a human sub-species. And as far as the internet? One of X's loyal students-Sage-uses her technopathy powers to hide mutants even on the internet. But this post isn't about the X-Men who lay in the shadows, but instead about three potential heroes they recruit. This 12-episode series would be streamed online and feature four episodes for our three main characters, exploring their lives before The X-Men. And the show would be called "The New Mutants".

Nightcrawler

Nightcrawler's story conveys to the viewer the same thing they've seen from every X-Men story; people fear mutant-kind. It takes place in Paris, France, as a travelling German circus makes it way into the city. Kurt Wagner is but one of many performances at the circus, alongside his adopted sister and brother he is an acrobat, the star acrobat called "The Amazing Nightcrawler". People think he's just wearing a costume, but after he and his siblings are captured by a mutant slavery ring, he has to use his newly discovered powers to escape. During the course of the story, his sister's own latent mystical abilities aid their escape, but slowly effect their brother. By the end, Kurt's brother is driven into madness, spearheaded by his jealousy of Kurt and his sister's talents. Many members of the circus, including Kurt's adoptive mother and sister are killed by the brother. When the townspeople see Kurt mercy killing his brother they assume he's a demon and he's responsible for the deaths. Kurt hides and is helped by Professor X and his student Angel. Angel's inclusion is to push the religious subtext of the story and to show angels and demons are not as black and white as people assume. He leaves with his new friends, taking the fencing swords of his dead siblings and swearing to treat his new family with the same love and respect. As for a "main villain" there is a Marvel villian called The Ringmaster who could run the slave circuit and have psychic control over his henchmen via a hypnotic device. A cameo by Mystique (Kurt's mother) disguising herself as background characters would also be included.

Storm

Our next story takes us to Kenya, Africa where an accomplished street thief named Orono has been living the life of a sly, cunning criminal. She owes her success to her newly discovered powers of weather manipulation. Nothing big, just a few gusts and static shocks. She tries to rob some rich-looking socialite when he catches her, has her arrested, and then delivers her to his mansion. It is revealed this man is the rumored crime lord of the country "The Shadow King". He reveals his powers of psychic manipulation and his group of treasure hunters from around the globe. With Orono's ability to alter weather he can finally part the sandstorm hiding the hidden city of Wakanda, home to technology and metal material beyond comprehension. She agrees to join him, falling for his fake charm. Orono's original plan was to betray him at the last second, but she cannot escape his control. With help from distant followers Professor X and Marvel Girl, Orono escapes control and uses the sandstorm to take down the hunters one by one, using her abilities to new levels. The Shadow King eventually captures the mind of Marvel Girl and makes her fight Orono while he finds "his old rival" Professor X. Using her powers, Marvel Girl overcomes the control and gives Orono the ability to defeat Shadow King from within their minds. Shadow King is paralyzed in a state of comatose as Orono leaves with Marvel Girl. Before leaving the country, Orono decides to give back to her people by causing a rainstorm. They call her a goddess as she leaves with her new friends. Storm's story displays the abuse of power some mutants experience and how only a lucky few get a chance to realize their mistakes and make up for them.

Colossus

Piotr Rasputin was just a humble farm-boy living in the plains of Russia when his little sister was almost ran over by his father who-while driving a mowing machine-was distracted. Piotr ran in front of his sister and took the hit, activating his mutant ability of forming metal skin. From there he becomes a local hero, using his newfound strength to repair broken homes and his invulnerability to rangle strong animals. But this isn't the story of a folk hero, this is a story of how a government responds when one of their citizens becomes a weapon. Piotr is whisked away from his town to serve his country as Agent Colossus. They teach him how to fight, how to shoot, and how to be the perfect soldier. They use him to collect escaped operatives. Former members of the "Black Widow" program, Nazi robots confiscated by the Soviets, their own super-soldier known as The Red Guardian, and finally their last mutant soldier Omega Red. Red was a mutant whose powers were enhanced by the Soviet Union and he was made into an unstoppable killing machine. Deemed too dangerous he was supposed to be put on ice similar to their "Winter Soldier" program, but he escaped. In his quest to find and kill Omega Red, Colossus meets Professor X and Cyclops. He and Cyclops relate on a soldier/student level, but it is Cyclops' perspective on serving your beliefs before your government that gets Colossus thinking. Omega Red is eventually defeated, but Colossus suggests they put him on ice and get to work psychically rehabilitating him. Meanwhile, he ditches his superiors to go live with his family. When he sees his family they tell him to join Professor X's team, knowing their son was always meant for more in life. As he leaves, his sister promises to meet him again. Next time, she says, she'll be strong like him!

And with that I invite you to The Panel Biter's X-Men Pitch (PBXP), a new series of posts with my recommendations on how Disney/Marvel show handle using The X-Men in their universe. Hope you enjoyed! Thanks for reading! 

I Don't Really Care About Star Wars

Full disclaimer: I don't dislike Star Wars. I don't hate Star Wars. I just don't really care about it. So, can we still be friends? Come on. Fine. I'll explain myself.

If you don't know what "Star Wars" is you're either a toddler or a Tibetan monk. Actually, I've seen my fair share of toddlers wearing Storm Trooper outfits. Anyway, you know what it is, I know what it is. So what's my beef? Well, to put all the cards out on the table I've seen the original trilogy and I like them just fine. Han, Luke, and Leia are all three-dimensional characters, Chewbacca and R2D2 are fun, Darth Vader is iconic for a reason, and the lore of the first three films is so mysterious and open that nothing feels generic. Even the most generic thing about Star Wars-The Force-feels like multiple concepts at once. It's a force of power, but also a religion. It's a way of life, but also a tool. It's everywhere at once, but it's also an entity. That's all fine and good and it paved the way for storytelling. To have an issue with the original trilogy being the blueprints for science-fiction is like hating Superman for being the blueprint for all superheroes. But after that? Eh, I can take it or leave it.

All that expanded universe stuff is cool and I'm happy writers want to expand this universe and give more to the people who love the franchise, but if that stuff is optional to the main story I don't feel inclined to learn about any of it if I just prefer the first three films. Cartoon-wise I've seen some "Clone Wars" and that show was alright, made Anakin more bearable, a few neat characters came and went. Haven't played any video games. In terms of comics I've read 2016's "Chewbacca" which was a snore. "Lando" was pretty fun. And "Darth Maul" was okay, just not worth following in my opinion. And, of course, the prequels. Here's the thing, I've seen enough and heard enough of those films to avoid them like the plague. Anakin was a horrible protagonist/tragic villain, the series has three villains who really needed more time then they got, and the dated CGI and awkward scene layout just don't carry the same magic. The Force is made into a unit of measurement, the Senate is boring, the mystique of Yoda is ruined, and no amount of young Obi-Wan Kenobi will make up for the "comic relief character". Padme was pretty cute, though. But we all know the prequels were bad, and undeserving of the fandom the first three created. This is coming from someone who is burned for loving DC Comic's characters every time a new Warner/DC movie comes out so I can sympathise with feeling betrayed, but then there are the modern films.

At the time of this article, I have not seen "Rogue One" or "The Last Jedi" or "Rebels". I am tempted to watch "Rogue One", but I have no interest in "The Last Jedi" due to my reaction to "The Force Awakens". I do not like Rey. I understand what her character is supposed to be, but just because she isn't as whiny as Luke doesn't mean she's a better character. Just because she's insanely powerful with The Force, a good pilot, an engineer, and she's hot doesn't mean she's a great character. I find her ability to become the best at whatever she tries annoying and robbing her of weakness, which in 2017, God forbid she has. I don't see the appeal of Poe, being the best pilot doesn't equal interesting character, even if he's sly. Phasma exists, Snoke exists just to drum up theories just like Rey (if she nobody's daughter I'll like her a little more), and BB8 is probably the second best droid ever just because he's the new R2D2. Kylo is, well, he's a teenage boy in the body of Wayne Campbell. Seriously, this kid finds out his grandpa was a space dictator and decides that's way cooler than being a magic wizard priest like his uncle, dresses like his dark idol, devotes his life to the cool, badass side, and wants to be stronger than everyone so badly he'd kill his father. And what part of him am I supposed to respect? His impractical Lightsaber? His generic looking mask? How about all the times he does cool Force stuff and then undercuts it by being a whiny, privileged douche? Boy, I loved it when Darth Vader whined at The Emperor because he was kept out of the loop, that was so cool. Matter of fact the only time I found a Star Wars villain as annoying as Kylo was when Anakin started to become Darth Vader. Seems like the coolest Star Wars villains are the ones you don't see in their angsty phases. The only new character I liked was Finn. He used to be a Storm Trooper, got sick of seeing his friends die and ran away, but after coming to care for his new Rebel friends he decides to overcome his fears and fight for another cause larger than himself, this time on the side of freedom. THAT is a character. His arc is quick, clean, and to the point. He has his low start, his moment of doubt, and finally his rise to action. There's no mystery around him, no theories, no metaphor or social commentary he's just a good guy who wants to do good things. And he's a Storm Trooper. You know, those guys who probably hang out with Goombas and Putties in their spare time? The Parademons and Normal-Types of their universe? For once one of these disposable goons is an actual character! That's new and different!

What isn't new or different is this new Star Wars Trilogy. I've heard "The Last Jedi" does new stuff, but I just don't think this series is for me. Like I said, I like Star Wars in a general, first glance kind of way. The early characters are great, but at risk of sounding like an old fart the new stuff just doesn't feel the same. It doesn't feel better or worse or like it provides anything, it feels like it's there and it's there to make a buck. Forty years from now when the Marvel Cinematic Universe and the Star Wars Universe are still kicking I'm still going to ignoring Star Wars and following Marvel. It doesn't just come down to fandom, it comes down to variety and a general path. The Marvel Universe has plenty of avenues to explore, but Star Wars will always just be more Star Wars. All that being said, if you love Star Wars then I have nothing but kinship with you. I completely understand cementing yourself in a property, hence this website. So if you disagree with me over any of the topics we discussed today, just know that for as different as we are, we are still the same. We just fly different ships.

Thank you for reading.

Spoiler Facts

Are you a fan of Stephanie Brown? Well, we got One Dozen Spoiler Facts for ya! Spoiler Alert! Sorry, couldn't resist.

1. Created in 1992, Stephanie Brown is the daughter of Arthur Brown AKA the villain Cluemaster. Cluemaster was one of many Batman villains invented in the 1960's and in his first appearance tried to deduce the identity of Batman. His next relevant appearance would be his formation of a new Injustice League made up of himself, Clock King, Major Disaster, Multi-Man, and Big Sir. These characters would become momentary Justice League members before returning to villainy.

2. Stephanie became the vigilante Spoiler after discovering her father was a supervillain. Although she lacked gadgets and proper training, she was physically fit and tech savvy, allowing her to "spoiler" her father's evil plans. While she first appeared in "Detective Comics #647" she later became a main character of the late 90's "Robin" series following Tim Drake. The two became lovers and partners ever since.

3. One of Steph's most important stories was a 1998 story arc in which she was revealed to be pregnant with her ex-boyfriend's child. Under a fake name, Tim Drake helps Steph through the pregnancy process and she gains the courage to give the baby up to adoption. This story of teen pregnancy in a time of violent and gritty storytelling was refreshingly mature and earned the title "Robin" the best ongoing title of 1998.

4. In 2004, after Tim Drake's father Jack discovered Tim's secret life as Robin he forbid Tim from fighting crime. In his absence, Stephanie volunteered to take his place until he could return. And so, Batman had a new Robin by his side in the form of Stephanie Brown. Although she was the first and only Robin to be female in the main DC continuity, her time as Robin only lasted a year when she was murdered in 2005 by Black Mask. Steph's death sparked an outrage by the DC fan community as Steph received no memorial in the Batcave, as opposed to Jason Todd-another Robin for a short time-who did get a memorial. Writers Dylan Horrocks and Devin Grayson (who wrote Batgirl, and Nightwing respectively) claimed her death was a decision by DC Editorial to be the big stinger of the event "War Games" and making her Robin was an attempt to trick readers into thinking she wouldn't be killed as she had just gotten a new identity. One of the few supporters of Steph's treatment was editor Dan DiDio who claimed "She was never really Robin". He also came up with the idea of making her Robin just to add some tragedy to her death.

5. Stephanie's main mentor in her training to become a vigilante was Cassandra Cain/Batgirl. During their time training, Cass taught Steph how to defend herself and Steph taught Cass how to have a real life outside of fighting. After the "death" of Batman in 2009, Cass gave up the Batgirl mantle and gave Steph permission to take her place. Despite Barbara's advice, Steph became the new Batgirl. Her book was well-received and a beacon of light for the Batman-titles. After the New 52, fans would be disappointed with Stephanie's absence until 2014 when she'd appear in the main Batman title. Stephanie is currently going by Spoiler and is on Batman's "Gotham Knights" team alongside Cassandra/Orphan and Tim/Red Robin in the title "Detective Comics".

6. After Tim Drake's "death" in "Detective Comics", Steph leaves Batman's team and blames Batman for Tim's death. His future, his talents, and his life outside of being Red Robin were all robbed from him because of the mission of vigilantism that Batman inspired him to take. She threatens to reveal Batman's secret identity to the world if he doesn't retire, but chickens out at the last minute, promising as long as Batman continues to fight crime she will stay around to discredit him. After Tim Drake returned to life she dropped her grudge, but keeps Tim at arm's length now that he is fully committed to fighting crime.

7. For a short time, Spoiler had the ability to become completely invisible thanks to a cloaking device given to her by The Penguin. Tim Drake reveals this tech was a stolen device and Steph stopped using it after becoming Batgirl. Like Tim Drake, she is also proficient in the use of a Bo Staff. And while her martial arts do not scale next to Cass, and her intellect isn't near Tim or Barbara Gordon, Steph is experienced enough to keep pace with her peers. She is also one of the few Batman Family members with actual street smarts.

8. In 2015, DC Comics had an event called "Future's End" which showed a version of the DCU five years in the future. In Batgirl's tie-in we see Barbara Gordon has become a Venom-using vigilante named Bete Noir and she led a League of Batgirls including Lucius Fox's daughter Tiffany Fox, Cassandra Cain, and Stephanie Brown.

9. While no memorial was erected in Stephanie's honor in the Batcave following her death, The Teen Titans hung her costume up in a glass case next to a photo of Tim Drake's dead parents and the clothing of Connor Kent/Superboy after his death. Although she was never a member of The Teen Titans, the heroes knew Tim loved her and elected to pay her respect.

10. Steph and Tim's relationship has gone through rough times. From Tim being suspected of cheating to Spoiler's ulterior motives interfering with Tim's goals. After Batman's "death", Tim went on a mission to investigate his "death" and prove he was still alive. Unbeknownst to Tim Drake, Batman had talked to Stephanie before his "death" and told her should he ever die to not only refuse Tim's pleads for help in searching for him, but also to hinder Tim's investigations. Batman asked this of her to make Tim stronger as a result of his death and help Tim understand death is death and he needs to handle it instead of denying it. Steph worked with villains like The Scarab and The General in an attempt to distract Tim, this almost got her killed and her relationship became nearly non-existent with Tim as a result.

11. Although she has not been a member of The Justice League, Stephanie-as Batgirl-was once recruited by Wonder Woman alongside Batwoman, Supergirl, Lightning, and Stargirl to help stop Professor Ivo's fake alien invasion on The White House.

12. In season two of "Young Justice", Stephanie Brown is a civilian abducted by the alien race known as The Reach. In the upcoming third season of the show-"Young Justice: Outsiders"-Stephanie will appear again, this time as a main character and member of the Young Justice team under the name Spoiler.
Thanks for reading!

TOT: Aquamilk

Remember that one time Aquaman had to bathe in cow milk to survive?

Aquaman has been the subject of plenty of criticism. With the hook-hand and the "Super Friends" and that guy in "Justice League" who everyone calls Aquaman for some reason, even though he really isn't Aquaman. He actually looks and sounds more like Lobo, but again he's called Aquaman so I think we all just got really confused. 

Anyway, the strange choices made in Aquaman stories go back a long way. All the way to "Adventure Comics #256" in 1959. In this story, Aquaman is kidnapped by smugglers. These smugglers plan on tossing Aquaman out of their plane into a desert so that the heat will kill him. See, around this time in comic books everyone had to have an exploitable weakness. Like, The Green Lantern was weak to the color yellow and Wonder Woman lost all her powers when she binded or tied up. So naturally, Aquaman became weak when out of the ocean for more than an hour. And hot conditions like a desert speed the process up. This weakness isn't all forgotten, though. Aquaman can live on land like the rest of us, but desert heat and lack of liquid does hit him harder than the rest of us.

Along with Aquaman, his companion was kidnapped too. No, not Aqualad. Not Mera. Not Barnacle Boy. Topo. Who is Topo? Why, Topo is Aquaman's pet sidekick! Superman has a Superdog, so Aquaman has an octopus! Topo The Octopus shows up now and again and was pretty helpful given his extra limbs and loyalty to Aquaman. Topo and his two other octopus friends are captured by the smugglers, but left on the plane. The smugglers just kind of circle Aquaman while the undersea hero spends the next four hours walking towards this small town in the desert. The liquid he managed to acquire was water from a car radiator belonging to some sand-buggy drivers. Drivers he refuses a ride from. What an idiot. When he makes it to town he goes looking for liquid only to learn the smugglers went to the town's water reservoir and turned off the water, meaning every fawcett in town is dry. Though he doesn't check the toilets or looks for water bottles. Maybe it's one of those places where bottled water is illegal. Which is true! Well, it was 59' so maybe they didn't invent the plastic bottle yet. That was a joke.

After recharging from a melted ice rink, Aquaman walks up towards the reservoir only to see the smugglers hiding in a house next to a barn. On a mountain. Surrounded by desert. Okay. Aquaman hides in the barn still hurting from a lack of liquid when he is met by Topo and his pals who escaped. In the barn are a few cows, so Aquaman grabs a trowel and commands Topo and friends to milk the cows and fill the trowel with it. And then he bathes in it.

Rejuvenated by the proteins of derry products Aquaman punches the smuggler and the day is saved by milk! For the second time, mind you. Aquaman and Aqualad once saved themselves from a un-watery grave using milk straight from a goat's udder. To be fair to this story it was written in 1959 when comic books were still comedic and silly and only two years later would they try to be a bit more serious. Besides, at least the milk thing made sense.The rule was that Aquaman needed liquid to maintain conscience so it's not like milk didn't count. Unless it's powdered milk, which is gross. I wonder if it were strawberry he'd come out pink? If it were chocolate he might not even come out at all!

Thanks for reading!

Sorry if I ruined milk for you!

What If Batman...

It's been a while since I wrote a "What If" scenario exploring the possibility of a character or event being changed in some way and seeing the repercussions of that change. I've talked about Superman being raised by apes and Spider-Man being bit by deadly erection-giving spiders, but one character I haven't touched on is The Dark Knight himself. And now-with multiversal versions of Batman featuring in "Dark Knights Metal"-it seems like the perfect time to explore a Batman who went down a very different road. So, What If Batman Was a Sorcerer?

First of all: this wasn't my first idea. I had three other Batman-related ideas I might want to try in the future. What if Jason Todd/Robin DIDN'T die in "Death in The Family"? What if Barbara Gordon/Batgirl DID die in "Killing Joke"? And what if  Bruce Wayne/Batman never recovered from his back injury in "Knightfall"? If you're eager to read one of these possibilities first, comment below! But for this post I wanted to do something crazy. Batman, a sorcerer? Batman has already proved himself an amazing martial artist, scientist, engineer, detective, chemist, linguist, singer, musician, inventor, business man, and actor. But magic? He's never really touched it. Spiritualism, sure. But not magic.

In this What If he's not just going to knock on Zatanna's front door. No, no, Bruce is going to learn magic early in his life. See, we all know Bruce spends some ten or so years training himself after the death of his parents, but one form of training may overlook is his ability to escape traps. For that Bruce trained under magician/escape artist Giovanni Zatara, a superhero in his right. In modern tellings of this training he is also accompanied by Zatara's daughter Zatanna Zatara. She'll go on to be own superhero too, but most people don't know she and Bruce had a bit of a fling back then. After all, she's a teenage girl and this attractive, moody, teenage rich kid lives with her and her dad to learn some escape tricks? Kinda hard to fight hormones in that instance. But this is where our story starts to deviate. Bruce doesn't turn a nose at the concept of magic, he embraces it and insists Giovanni to teach him. After much coercing and pleads from his daughter, Zatara teaches Bruce a few basic spells to shut him up. But after Bruce makes it clear he's planning to do with this power, Giovanni uses magic to erase Bruce's memory of ever wanting to learn magic. The next decade proceeds as normal.

Until one of Batman's many encounters with The Mad Hatter, a villain specializing in hypnotism. After a close brainwashing, Bruce undergoes a psychological evaluation. He already knows how messed up in the head he is, he just wants to make sure he isn't any MORE messed up. He discovers a moment in time he can't account for, and he recalls The Mad Hatter making a comment about "not all the pieces being there" while trying to brainwash him. Upon further research and even risking his life against The League of Assassins, Batman meets with Ra's al Ghul, the only person he knows capable of mystic memory alteration. Out of respect for The Dark Knight's determination (and because his daughter has the hots for him) Ra's uses his own magic to trace it back to Giovanni Zatara. Then all it takes is a trip to Zatanna and some hero-to-hero trust to have Zatanna unlock the memories in Batman's mind. Rekindling the spark of magic laying dormant within.

From there Batman uses his small knowledge of magic to fully study the arts, becoming trained in conjuring, elemental manipulation, basic sorcery, levitation, teleportation, and spiritual projection. I think in Batman's case-personally speaking-he'd primarily use conjuring to keep an endless supply of tools, levitation to remove the need of a grappling gun, teleportation to remove the need of vehicles, and shadow manipulation and illusions to better utilize the fear of others. And some type of psychic abilities to be a better detective. And he'd actively avoid necromancy because-as much as he misses them-Batman knows he'd be disrespecting his parents if he revived them. Along with these abilities could come a slight change of costume, less heavy as he has mystic defenses now. Additionally, he'd probably pass on these abilities to his sidekicks. Nightwing would probably use magic to distract and annoy his foes, Batgirl would've avoided being crippled by The Joker, and Robin/Jason Todd might be alive if he knew a basic teleportation spell. The crime rate in Gotham would also fall down because-not only is their main hero invincible-but now he can use seals of containment to keep the bad guys in prison! If anything, guys like The Joker and Two-Face might make deals with devils and Poison Ivy and Mr. Freeze would try to become actual elementals, driving Gotham's masked community into a more extreme direction.

Batman would be more valuable on the Justice League, able to defeat Superman without any tools (maybe he'd loosen up knowing that), and he'd probably strike up a romance with Zatanna again seeing as how it's thanks to her he could achieve all this. Then again, he could end up being the target of The Spectre or Trigon, he could have an uneasy relationship with John Constantine or he could upset Swamp Thing and Etrigan The Demon. More power means more problems, too. And in the hands of someone like Batman, magic could be a dangerous tool. One that could be abused. It would truly be a test of will to see if the power would corrupt him, if The Joker killing one important person would set Batman off. And if this could turn The Dark Knight into a Dark Emperor. In that case it would take the whole Justice League to take him down, it would mean some type of ban on magic, and lead to the DC Universe seeing magic as a slippery slope. Just as Giovanni did all those years ago.

So those are some basic ideas covering Batman with magical powers. He'd probably do really well for the first few years, but let it all get to his head fast enough. As if a Batman with contingency plans wasn't scary enough now he can literally snap his fingers and lock you in a box. Maybe that's why Batman has to be the one human guy on the team, because otherwise his cracked brain would mesh with ultimate power like acid meshes with flesh. Well, at the very least we'd get a new evil Dark Knight for "Dark Knight Metal" out of it.

Thanks for reading!