TOT: Doc Ock's Coke Plot

Remember that one time Doctor Octopus created a cure for cocaine addiction?

In 1990, writer David Michelinie and artist Erik Larsen began an arc titled "The Return of The Sinister Six" in "The Amazing Spider-Man #334". In this arc, Doctor Octopus got his groove back and quick. After years of beatings served by the likes of Spider-Man, Daredevil, and Captain America, Doc Ock finally got his greasy mitts on some Adamantium. The same metal that laces Wolverine's bones and claws. With indestructible tentacles and a classy, white suit, Doc sought to form a new Sinister Six. There were a few roadblocks: Kraven was dead, The Shocker was a failure, and in the 1990's The Chameleon was kinda lame. Doc recruited Mysterio (The Master of Illusions), Vulture (That old guy in a bird costume who has no right looking that cool in "Spider-Man: Homecoming"), Electro (before he looked like Doctor Manhattan), Sandman (who's actually a good guy, he just forget that sometimes), and Hobgoblin. Why Hobgoblin? Um, it's the 90's. That's why!

Doctor Octopus' plan isn't just to form a geriatric boy-band. No, he plans on stealing and modifying a company satellite to disperse a poison that would kill everyone on Earth. However, he uses this plot as a threat as his true plan becomes clear. Doctor Octopus didn't create a poison. He created a cure. A cure to Cocaine Addiction. Yes, Doc's plan was to create a substance that would cause people to experience extreme convulsions when using cocaine. This would essentially cure addicts through pain. However, Doc's secondary plan would be to release the cure to the world and then collect cash from all the cocaine addicts who want the cure to the cure.

Maybe we should break this down again. First, Doc creates a formula that makes the human body instantly convulse when using cocaine. He releases that to the world. The cocaine addicts who need cocaine, but fear the convulsions must pay Doc for a formula to reverse the cure's effects. That way he would corner the market on cocaine addicts. What the hell!? First of all; you could have just made a death formula and threatened the world like you said you would. Or, I don't know, reverse the formula so everyone on Earth would be addicted? Hell, you have a convulsion formula. Just use that! Pretty sure Hobby uses that on Spidey at some point in the story. So just do that. Whichever plan you go with is just for money anyway. If you have a satellite with a substance you control you can basically hold the whole world hostage. Take over the world why don't you!

Anyway, let's all be thankful Thor stopped him. Yeah, Thor stopped him. Thanks, Blondie.

Thanks for reading.

That's Not Funny

The Joker. Sadistic, infamous, complex! Funny? That's up to interpretation. Is The Joker's last zinger of "The Killing Joke" really worth the page or could this flat act have a hidden meaning?

"Batman: the Killing Joke" is an amazing story. One of the most iconic Batman stories of all time, one of the most controversial stories of all time, and for some, the definitive origin story for The Joker. If you haven't read Alan Moore's 1988 graphic novel, "The Killing Joke" is about The Joker crippling Barbara Gordon, stripping her, and then taking photos of her to show her father Commissioner Gordon as he drags Gordon through an insane circus park. All the while Batman is chasing The Joker down, and we learn of The Joker's backstory.

He was once a normal man trying to pursue a career in stand-up comedy to support his pregnant wife and get them out of Gotham City. But he wasn't funny. He had to turn to a life of crime and rob the very same chemical plant he worked for. On the night of his heist, his wife died from electrocution and he had no other choice than go through with the robbery. It went array and he fell into a vat of acid that dyed his hair, reddened his lips, and bleached his skin. Whether it was the deforming acid or the loss of his family, this man began laughing and laughing with no end in sight. And thus, The Joker was born.

Pretty solid origin. Short, sweet, to the point. But one of the greatest things about "The Killing Joke" is all the things you can interpret from it. All the little nuances you miss until you re-read it a few times. Personally, I've gone through it maybe four times and I caught myself thinking about one moment in particular. A moment towards the end. And no, I don't mean the possibility of Batman killing The Joker. No, I chose to focus on the last lines of dialog The Joker has. He tells a joke, unsurprisingly, relating to Batman's offer to help rehabilitate him.

"No. I'm sorry, but... no. It's too late for that. Far too late. Hahaha. You know, it's funny. This situation. It reminds me of a joke... See, there were these two guys in a lunatic asylum. And one night, they decide they don't like living in the asylum anymore. They decide they're going to escape! So, like, they get up onto the roof, and there, just across this narrow gap, they see the rooftops of the town, stretching away into the moonlight. Stretching away to freedom. Now, the first guy, he jumps right across with no problem. But his friend, his friend daren't make the leap. Y'see... y'see, he's afraid of falling. So then the first guy has an idea... He says, 'Hey, I have a flashlight with me! I'll shine it across the gap between the buildings. You can walk across the beam and join me!' But the second guy just shakes his head. He suh-says... he says 'Wh-what do you think I am? Crazy?  You'd turn it off when I was halfway across!"

 Here's the thing about this joke: it isn't funny. Maybe it's just my sense of humor or maybe I'm not "enlightened" or "sophisticated" enough to understand it, but I don't think it's funny. It has all the makings of a joke: the build-up, the climax, the set-up, and finally the punchline. But it doesn't make me laugh or chuckle or anything. It's like a joke gone flat. "Why did the chicken cross the road". That's a classic. It's a classic because it can set up to numerous types of humor. "To get to the other side" would be anti-humor. "To f%$& your girlfriend" would be shock humor. But The Joker's last joke doesn't have any humor. Is that the joke? That it's not even funny?

And look, I get the point of the joke. The metaphor is not lost on me. Batman is the crazy guy who makes the leap to freedom no problem, and The Joker is the crazy guy too afraid to jump and too paranoid to trust the help of a fellow insane person. But while the joke has meaning, it lacks humor. It lacks forethought. I'd go as far as to say Alan Moore didn't care if the joke was funny, as long as it carried his point. And then Batman laughs at the joke, for some reason. Despite it being dumb. But maybe that's the real point.

I mentioned before that The Joker used to be a failed comedian, unable to make a crowd laugh the way he wanted to. While every other version of The Joker will tell a joke or spark a laugh out of the reader/viewer, The Joker in "Killing Joke" doesn't make us laugh. Everything he does is either horrific or sad. The other thing I mentioned was that the acid effected his skin, but his trip into lunacy wasn't just the acid's fault, it was the loss of his wife and child. What I mean is, while the acid changed his appearance and his mental breakdown turned him into a monster, he is still the same guy. The same sad, glory-seeking man hiding behind a smile. And he is still a bad comedian. I think Alan Moore made the last joke a bad joke to show us that for as different as he's become The Joker is still the man we met before. While everything on the outside is different, he is still the same awful comic underneath.

And Batman laughing? Well, maybe he likes bad jokes. That's why you never see him laugh.

Thanks for reading.

Beast Facts

Are you a fan of Beast Boy? Well, we got One Dozen Beast Boy Facts!

1. Garfield Logan's parents were scientists living in West Africa. His parents were abusive and neglecting, but when Gar contracted a disease called Sakutia they used reverse evolutionary technology and the DNA of the West African Green Monkey-an animal immune to the disease-they were able to transform their son into a monkey. After the effects wore off, Gar found he was completely green and could transform into any animal on Earth.

2. Despite being a well-known Teen Titan, Garfield was originally a member of The Doom Patrol. It is on this team that he invents the identity of "Beast Boy". He would return to The Doom Patrol many times in the future, and was even legally adopted by the leaders of the team Mento and Elasti-Girl.

3. When Beast Boy joined The New Teen Titans in the 1980's, he began using the name "Changling". He kept the name up until the 2000's when he went back to Beast Boy. It is assumed he uses the name Changling when he wants people to see him as an adult. He also dejected the Beast Boy name due to teasing by his previous guardian.

4. In his early days, Beast Boy wore a red and white suit with a black and purple mask to hide his identity. In the years that passed he was given a full black and purple face mask that would hide his green skin, as his skin would obviously tip people off to his secret identity. The black part of the mask would be swapped with yellow, the purple would be removed in favor for his green skin, the mask would be purple with green skin, and the black mask would have a red visor, among other changes over the years. When Marv Wolfman and George Perez enlisted Beast Boy onto The Teen Titans they removed the mask completely and made his identity public.

5. While on The Teen Titans, Gar fell in love with teammate Terra. Terra was revealed to be the lover/partner of their archenemy Deathstroke. Terra died in the final confrontation between Deathstroke, HIVE, and The Teen Titans. Despite her pure evil nature and betrayal, The Teen Titans still built a monument of her and Beast Boy's love for her did not vanish.

6. When he was not a member of The Teen Titans or The Doom Patrol, Garfield was an actor. He had  lead role on a "Star Trek" ripoff called Space Trek. In the "Teen Titans" episode "Episode 257-494" or "Don't Touch That Dial", a television program/film called "Clash of The Planets" has an all-day marathon. Beast Boy shows proficient knowledge in the themes, story, and cultural importance of the program and his knowledge ultimately saves the day. "Clash of The Planets" takes cues from Star Trek, Star Wars, and Gatchaman.

7. In 2000, Beast Boy got a four-issue miniseries in where the daughter of a Doom Patrol villain hired two mercenaries to murder Beast Boy's costars from Space Trek. Beast Boy was framed for their murder and had to clash with Nightwing, Raven, and many of his fellow Titans. This series helped Beast Boy find himself and resume a celebrity/superhero career.

8. In the "Teen Titans" animated series, it was established Beast Boy was a vegetarian. His explanation was that he had transformed into most of the animals people eat and found it uncomfortable. He shares his vegetarianism with his voice actor Greg Cipes. This characteristic was migrated into the comics shortly after the shows airing.

9. Also established in both the cartoon and around the 2000's was a romance between Beast Boy and Raven. A classic case of opposites attracting, Beast Boy and Raven had an on-and-off romance in the comics. Either coming together out of love and forgiveness or splitting up over Raven's instability and parentage.

10. In 2006, Superboy, Robin (Tim Drake), and Wonder Girl (Cassandra Sandsmark) died, and Cyborg and Starfire quit. Beast Boy-with the remaining Titans and any teenaged heroes who cared enough-formed a new Teen Titans and became their leader. The team roster was constantly changing and dissolving, but when Robin and Wonder Girl returned to life there was enough stability to salvage and Beast Boy got the credit he deserved. In the past. Beast Boy had tried to spin-off a team called Titans West. Titans West were a group of wannabe Titans who were not recruited back in the 80's and Beast Boy was one of them. He would later recreate the team, but watch it break up numerous times. This team should not be confused with The Titans East. In the season finally of "Teen Titans", Beast Boy and a ragtag team of reserve Titans band together to save the rest of the captured Teen Titans from The Brotherhood of Evil.

11. Beast Boy's powers allow him to transform into any animal on Earth. This includes tigers, lions, bears, various birds and fish, but it also extends to extinct and endangered animals, as well as dinosaurs and fossilized creatures. At some stages he has also been able to use the abilities of an animal without transforming. In the comics Beast Boy can communicate while in animal form, but this was changed for the cartoon. In "Young Justice", these abilities are granted to him via Martian DNA and his animal powers can be activated halfway, allowing him to be a hybrid of human and animal. In both cartoons he also shows the ability to transform into alien animals, while in the comics he once transformed into an alien slave of Darksied. With the seed of Trigon within him he could transform into demonic creatures. In "Teen Titans" he was laced with psychological-altering chemicals which made him develop a werewolf-like form. While only doing this once in the present, in possible future stories Beast Boy shows the ability to turn into mythical beasts like chimera, dragons, and a phoenix. This was in the future of "Kingdom Come" where was known as "Menagerie". As "Animal Man" in the future of "Titans Tomorrow", Gar was able to split himself in copies like an amoeba and create an army of shapeshifting heroes.

12. In 2011, the New 52 version of Beast Boy appeared as a minion of "Harvest". This version was now red instead of green. This is because "The Red" is established as a mystical force shared between all animals on Earth. DC/Vertigo character Animal Man taps into this power to use the powers of animals, so for the New 52 Beast Boy was made red to match that force as well. In 2014's "Teen Titans" title he was made green again with no explanation or reference to The Red.

Thanks for reading.

Hey Harold!

For all his talk of brooding and being alone and striking fear into others, Batman has quite the large family. Sons, daughters, butlers, and lovers. Dogs and cows and giant bat monsters. Well, today you'll meet the weird uncle. Today's Z-Lister is Harold Allnut from DC Comics.

Dennis O'Neil and Alan Grant created Harold Allnut in "The Question #33" in 1989, but after his brief appearance there he migrated into O'Neil and Grant's "Batman" in #458. Harold was a mute man with Kyphosis-a physical disability that makes him a hunchback. Despite his appearance and shy nature, Harold is a gifted inventor. Harold fled Hub City after being dispatched by the landlord and fled to Gotham City where he mislead by The Penguin. By conning him with food, shelter, and safety, The Penguin manipulated Harold into building deadly weapons for him. After Batman vanquished The Penguin, Harold ran off.

Months after this adventure, Batman finds Harold being chased by an angry mob of parents. Apparently a child molester had been in the neighborhood and the mob assumed it was Harold by his appearance. Batman and Harold find and apprehend the actual criminal and Batman offers Harold a job. Harold lives in the Batcave and is given all the tools he needs to help equip Batman with weapons and gadgets. In return for a nice home. Though Alfred is hesitant, he and the rest of the family come to like Harold. Due to his gentle nature Harold also strikes up a friendship with Ace The Bat-Hound.
During a story called "Knightfall", Bane breaks Batman's back and Bruce is left immobile. While Harold builds a high-tech wheelchair, Batman's friend and partner Jean-Paul Valley takes up The Batman mantle. Sadly, he takes it too far. Using his own high-tech weapons to kill criminals and become more ruthless by the day. Valley expels Harold and the others from The Batcave, but Harold and Ace sneak into a hidden subsection of the cave and work on gear to defeat Valley. Along with Robin and Nightwing, Harold helps Bruce defeat Valley within the cave. After Valley psychologically recovered, he became an agent of Batman. Batman sent Harold to live with Jean-Paul at a renovated castle so the two of them could fight crime together. Before leaving Harold made a new costume for Nightwing too.
In the storyline "Hush", Harold returns from years of absence now able to speak and stand upright. He confronts Batman during Batman's investigation of a new villain in Gotham City. Harold reveals this villain-Hush-repaired his body in return for a hidden circuitry relay in the Batcave. Hush used this relay to send Batman subliminal messages while he was unconscious, setting to motion the events of the story. Before Harold can reveal Hush's identity, but is shot by Hush from a distance. Batman holds his dying friend and forgives him for the betrayal as he understands how powerful the desire to be happy can be.
Harold reappears in 2017's "All-Star Batman" by Scott Snyder. In that series, he meets with Batman on a farm to perform surgery on Harvey Dent's face. By the dialog it would seem Harold is back to non-normalcy and is considered family by Batman.
Harold is one of the more obscure additions to Batman's supporting cast. He's no vigilante or officer of the law, but rather a kindred spirit who just wants to help the people who care about him. There is something admirable about Batman taking Harold in, it shows a shade of sympathy we don't see from Batman. Sure, adopting a few orphans is commendable, but you can chalk that up to self-impression. Batman adopts orphans because he is one. But Harold is a grown man, with no abilities of describing his past or how he feels. And yet Harold is treated with such respect and care, that truly shows Batman has a softer side. A side not driven by guilt or lust or fear, but rather compassion. The same compassion his parents felt for the people of Gotham City. I'm glad Harold is back and I hope to see him help the Batman Family in the future, he could make a great foil to Damian or maybe Jason. Wherever he may go, he's got my support!
Thanks for reading.

What If The Teen Titans...

"Justice League" and "Teen Titans" were some of the greatest animated series in comic book pop culture history. Justice League was built over an entire decade through numerous television shows and was beloved for having a great narrative, flawless continuity, and fleshed-out characters. Teen Titans captured young viewers across the nation with it's unique animation, well-developed characters, and memorable episodes. For as good as they both might be, my theory could make them even better. What if The Teen Titans and The Justice League Animated Series were set in the same universe?

While most of my "What If" posts revolve around certain scenarios and the repercussions of them, this entree is an actual theory. One of the few comic book related theories I've come up with. The reason JL (Justice League) and TT (Teen Titans) never crossed over was because the brains behind the DC Animated Universe-Paul Dini and Bruce Timm-didn't work on TT so they didn't count it as part of their universe. The DCAU consisted of cartoons based off of Batman, Superman, Static, Batman Beyond, Zeta, and The Justice League. Due to the difference in animation, the use of certain characters, and overall lack of communication between both of the show's crews, TT and JL never got the chance to crossover. However, I believe that Dini and Timm left hints to something saying the opposite. That in fact, Teen Titans might have been a precursor to Justice League.

Exhibit A: Dick Grayson

It all starts with Dick. Featuring in "Batman: The Animated Series", Dick Grayson is a college-aged crime-fighter who works alongside his legal guardian Bruce Wayne/Batman. As Robin he remained on the show for three seasons, but in season four Dick returned as Nightwing. However, Nightwing couldn't make any appearances in JL aside from a possible background cameo due to another version of Dick Grayson hitting television. In "Teen Titans: The Animated Series", Dick Grayson appears as a sixteen year old vigilante known as Robin. Leaving his unnamed mentor behind to pursue a solo career that is swiftly exchanged for leading a team of teen heroes. In the episode "How Long is Forever?", Starfire travels twenty years into the future and finds Robin is now Nightwing. When she returns and tells Robin of this adventure, he takes a liking to the name. So, our hypothetical timeline seems to imply Dick Grayson-between the ages of nine and twelve based on prior origin stories-became Batman's sidekick, left his side at sixteen, led the Teen Titans, returned around eighteen, and became Nightwing a year later? It would explain a lot. Comic book versions of Dick Grayson at that time implied he was between nine and sixteen when he was Batman's sidekick, so why would the animated version be eighteen? Where was he prior to season one of "BTAS"? Where did get the whole "Nightwing" idea? Let's move on.

Exhibit B: Wally West

Well, this is clearly reversed. Wally West appears in his early to mid-twenties in "Justice League" in 2001, but in 2005 an episode of TT called "Lightspeed" featured Wally West as Kid Flash, clearly being around sixteen. Well, if TT's Wally grew up into JL's Wally it would make perfect sense. Wally and Dick being around the same age in TT, and being around the same age in JL? Dick growing up to be Nightwing, and Wally growing up to be The Flash just as they did in the comics? Further more in season three of JLU there is an episode called "Flash And Substance" where The Flash Museum is built and in it is a glass case containing the Kid Flash costume. In the very same episode Wally mentions having "an uncle" who is attending the museum opening. As if there are any other relevant uncles in Wally West's life. And in case you weren't following: Kid Flash appeared in TT in 2005, but that JL episode about The Flash's museum came out in 2006. Coincidence? Why would Wally have a Kid Flash costume to give to the museum? Was he the only Flash or was his "uncle" The Flash before him while was his sidekick like in the comics? Speaking of which, in the comics Barry Allen created a costume he could fold into a super-small shape and store in a ring, but when Wally shows off the very same in ring in JL he has a dozen of them. Barry would use and reuse the same one because he knew how to fold it, but Wally has several rings because he's either too lazy or too impatient to fold one. And where did he get the rings? Or the suit? Let's move on.

Exhibit C: Terry McGinnis & Virgil Hawkins

Finally we come to the most unlikely source of reference, "Static Shock" and "Batman Beyond". Two shows related to the DCAU, but pretty far removed. Static focused on one teenaged superhero, and Batman Beyond was in the far future. In the episode "Future Shock", Static travels to the future and teams up with Old Bruce Wayne and his successor Terry McGinnis. However, Static isn't unfamiliar with Bruce as he met him in an earlier episode titled "The Big Leagues" where Batman and Robin teamed-up with Static. During their team-up, Static asks Terry what ever happened to Robin. Terry claims "he's with The Titans". Virgil replies, "You mean with that little green guy". This is pretty solid evidence. That is, if they were talking about the same Robin. The Robin who met Static was Tim Drake, the sidekick of Batman in season four of "BTAS". Before Tim, Static didn't really know the other Robin. Terry-on the other hand-has heard of Dick Grayson. He borrowed some of Dick's clothes at Wayne Manor, and Commissioner Barbara Gordon talks about Dick with Terry over coffee. Terry didn't know who Tim Drake was until the film "Batman Beyond: The Return of The Joker". So while Static is imagining Tim Drake/Robin hanging out with Beast Boy, Terry is thinking of Dick Grayson and the adult Titans. And yes, I said adult. They are never mentioned, but if the end of Starfire's future trip is any indication The Teen Titans-one way or another-would most likely reunite in adulthood. Especially with so many members, as the team reaches army levels at the end of season five. Remember, Starfire's future trip was twenty years (Dick went from sixteen to thirty-six) and Terry's future is forty years (now placing Dick at fifty-six). But then you may be wondering, "How can Static know who Beast Boy is if TT takes place two or three years before "BTAS"". Enter Speedy. Roy Harper/Speedy appeared in the TT episode "Winner Takes All" and appeared to be sixteen or seventeen. This was in 2004. Then in the JLU episode "Patriot Act", Speedy is summoned to aid Green Arrow. He looks like he's in his mid-twenties. This was in 2006. When he shows up in JLU, Speedy is wearing the exact same costume as the one in TT. So why can't Beast Boy and the other Titans be active during Static's early days? Clearly Nightwing, The Flash, and Speedy all are. Why would either Static or Terry know about The Titans if they don't exist in this universe? Why are Dick, Wally, and Roy visibly teenagers in TT, but all young adults in JL? Time to wrap up.

Now there are two things in the way of this theory. One, the comic book continuations. Both Justice League and Batman Beyond got comic book series expanding on their lore after the DCAU was off television. The Teen Titans got a short-lived comic extension as well (sadly named "Teen Titans Go!"). In their comics, The Justice League was referenced by Beast Boy. Of course, these are just comic tie-ins. Can they really count? The second issue is just the unlikeliness of it all. I'm sure Paul Dini and Bruce Timm and Dwayne McDuffie all saw what Teen Titans was like. I'm sure all their references to The Teen Titans and the legacies of their characters were just plain old references. But given the timelines syncing up, given the missing backstories, and given the timing in which episodes came out, I like to believe the men behind Justice League Unlimited wanted to make some kind of connection. But hey, that's just a theory. A Comic Book Theory!

Thanks for reading!

Swear on my life, I'll never make that joke again.

Alias Facts

Are you a fan of Jessica Jones? Well, we got One Dozen Jessica Jones Facts for you!

1. Jessica debuted in "Alias" written by Brian Micheal Bendis. The title was the first series to fall under Marvel's new imprint "MAX". Created to suite stories with mature content, uncensored dialog, and adult situations, the MAX Imprint was universally recognized for it's large logo. The logo was made large so that young readers and their parents wouldn't accidentally buy an adult book. Stan Lee was once quoted with disliking the idea of the MAX Imprint, simply because he himself would never write a story to be mature.

2. Brian Michael Bendis intended on using Jessica Drew/Spider-Woman as the main character of "Alias", but Marvel Editorial refused to let him use her. Spider-Woman had been a reappearing member of The Avengers and-due to her name-was associated with Spider-Man. Marvel didn't feel she was a wise selection for a book so adult. So Bendis created Jessica Jones. This was ultimately a good decision as most of Jones' important stories were written by Bendis, giving him almost complete control of the character's history.

3. Jessica attended high school with Peter Parker, having a crush on him back then. After the accident that gave her superpowers and killed her parents, Peter tried to befriend her as he sensed she was a kindred spirit, but Jess took this as pity. When the two of them were part of The New Avengers, Jessica revealed the high school crush after Spider-Man revealed his identity to his teammates. Jess claims it was only an old crush, but her husband Luke Cage still felt some resentment.

4. In "Alias", the character Carol Danvers/Ms. Marvel appears as a friend of Jessica. Daredevil is also briefly featured, and, as previously stated, Spider-Woman was the original character Bendis was going to use. Luke Cage is also involved in the story. This is all relevant because when Bendis went on to write New Avengers, Jessica, Luke, Carol, Daredevil, and Spider-Woman were all part of his initial run on the series.

5. Jessica Jones and Luke Cage do not have the traditional romance. The first time the two met they ended up having sex. "The butt-f&%$ heard around the world" as the narration put it. Later Jess learns Luke got her pregnant. At first, Luke offers to stick around and help her support their child, but the two do end up falling in love. After their daughter is born, the two get married in Doctor Strange's basement during "Civil War".

6. Danielle Cage was named after Luke Cage's best friend Danny Rand/The Iron Fist. In the alternate future of "Old Man Logan", Danielle is one of the only remaining superpowered people. And in another alternate future, Danielle is twice as strong as her parents and has become Captain America.

7. Jessica's primary enemy is Zebediah Killgrave/The Purple Man. Back when she was a superhero, Jessica tried to fight The Purple Man only for him to use his mind control powers to turn her into his sex slave. She remained under his control for eight months before-in a fit of rage-he sent her to kill Daredevil at Avengers Mansion. She accidentally knocked-out The Scarlet Witch and The Avengers attacked her, putting her into a coma. When she woke up, The Avengers and SHIELD offered her membership to make it up to her, but she refused and became an alcoholic private detective.

8. Jessica has had a few superhero identities. Her first was "Jewel", she wore a white and blue costume and wore a pink wig. She left this identity after the Purple Man incident. She had a brief stint as "Knightress" during a sequel series to "Alias" called "The Pulse". She almost used the name "Power Woman" at the request of Luke Cage, but denied it when Luke got too excited about it.

9. At the end of "Alias" we are treated to a "What If" in where Jessica accepts The Avengers' offer to join them. In this alternate universe she becomes a respected member of The Avengers and marries Captain America.

10. During "Alias", Carol tries to hook Jessica up with Scott Lang/Ant-Man. The two of them are written as broken, desperate, afraid people and the relationship ultimately doesn't work. The two do consider each other as "work friends" at the time being.

11. During an X-Men story in which The X-Men have to travel within Wolverine's mind to save him, Magik finds a room in Logan's mind labelled "Sexual Fantasies". Behind this door is a red-lit bedroom full of sex paraphernalia and occupied by Mystique, Emma Frost, Spiral, and Jessica Jones in her Jewel costume. Presumably Logan got these feelings during the time he and Jess were on The New Avengers together. Also in this sex room was Squirrel Girl, who was confirmed to be twenty until 2014.

12. Among the superheroes considered by Jessica Jones and Luke Cage to babysit their daughter there was Hellcat, Mantis, Demotion Man (three times), Firebird, Machine Man, Echo, Maggie from The Runaways, Ultra Girl, Groot, Howard The Duck's human girlfriend Beverly, Deadpool, Sepulchre, Stature/Cassy Lang, She-Hulk, Nighthawk, Tigra, and Squirrel Girl. Squirrel Girl got the job, despite Wolverine offering to watch the baby first.
Thanks for reading.

The F Means Hope

You know I understand how Batman and Iron Man and Captain America got their costumes, but Spider-Man? Superman? Daredevil? These guys are not rich or backed by the government. Let's just be grateful they didn't go full DIY like today's Z-Lister, The Forbush Man from Marvel Comics.

First appearing in the short-lived satirical series "Snafu" in 1995, Irving Forbush was created by Stan Lee and Jack Kirby to be the mascot/founder of "Snafu". Kind of like MAD Magazine's Alfred E. Neuman, albeit forty-three years after MAD's conception. In 1967's "Not Brand Echh", Stan and Jack brought Irving back as the all-powerful Forbush Man! This new version of Forbush was a lowly employee of "Marble Comics". He became a superhero after his aunt slammed a pot over his head, the resulting appearance gave him the idea to build his "costume". As stated in a fictional edition of The Daily Bugle, Irving was born on Friday the 13th, and his parents Stan and Jacqueline (I get it) wanted a daughter instead. In Issue #5 of "Not Brand Echh", The Forbush Man accidentally defeats a parody of The Juggernaut. He goes on to apply for The Revengers, The Echhs-Men, and finally S.H.E.E.S.H., but he is rejected by all of them for his track record of winning via dumb luck.

From there Irving was mostly an in-joke over at Marvel. Appearing on random lists and being referenced by guys like Spider-Man. For a while it was unknown as to whether Irving was in his own universe, a work of fiction within Marvel Comic's, or if he was part of the Marvel Universe. Well, the question was finally answered...in 2006. Before that he was featured in many "What If..." stories including his version of "The Death of Superman". That story included a story in which The Forbush Man died fighting Dumsday. Forbush Man was also the mascot of another Marvel magazine called "Marvel Age" for the entirety of it's nine year publication.

Finally in 2006 Forbush Man appeared in the series "Nextwave" as a member of The New Paramounts, a team of characters who premiered in "Not Brand Ecch. While not evil, Forbush Man was misguided and fought members of Nextwave. It was revealed in this appearance that he in fact has one superpower. By removing his helmet, Forbush Man can instill hellish visions into his opponents, making them see and feel exactly what they imagine Hell to be. He even claimed to have used the power to save the entire Earth from God-Level threats, but because the ability works so quickly and can only be perceived by his target nobody would know if he were telling the truth or not. The only time he tries to use the power in this story it fails because his target "lacks a mind" to torture.

His final appearance was during "Captain America: Who Won't Wield The Shield" in 2010. In this one-shot, Forbush Man breaks into Marvel Comics and starts attacking employees and claiming they have made comic books too dark and gritty and killing Captain America was the final straw. Irving is killed by security guards, but reappears at the end of the book as a zombie. Oh, and for all you eagle-eyed Netflix viewers. Keep an eye out for a Police Poster featuring Stan Lee in Daredevil, Jessica Jones, Luke Cage, and Iron Fist. While the poster shows Stan Lee as a cop, the name given on the poster to Stan is "Irving Forbush".

Where to start? I compared Forbush to Neuman at the beginning of this post, but I can see where the comparison ends. Because he is a Stan/Jack creation, the rest of Marvel Comics seems to have a real soft spot for this character. Using him as a main character for Marvel self-parodies, making him the mascot of magazines, referencing him, including him in stories for a good laugh. For as obscure as he is Forbush has been part of Marvel for a very long time. Through thick and thin, I might say. I mean, having him be a joke character with an incredibly powerful (and possibly fictional) superpower makes him one of those jokes you can't wipe off the panel so easily. But that last appearance kind of struck me as odd. Attacking Marvel itself for getting morbid, and then becoming a zombie. I guess it's some ironic lesson about how cylindrical and predicable comic books had become, that even a throw-away character like Forbush could fall victim to seriousness and horror. I'm sure this isn't the last of The Forbush Man we will see, especially in an era full of Hydra Captain Americas and gender-bent Thors. If you ask me, the world could use a little Forbush right about now.

Thanks for reading.

Ironheart-To-Heart

Keeping in theme with replacing straight, Caucasian men with teenagers of varied races, ages, sexual orientations, and religions, Marvel Comics has replaced their cinematic poster boy with something new. But is she actually new? Who is Riri Williams and why shouldn't she be the new Iron Man?

In 2015, writer Brian Michael Bendis began writing "Invincible Iron Man". He got fourteen issues, and a seven issue side-series called "International Iron Man", before Marvel did the "Number 1's sell better" thing and set the main book back to issue one. In the main title, Bendis established this character named Riri Williams, a engineering student over at MIT. Riri creates an Iron Man armor and stops a prison break out. After hearing about her, Tony takes her on as an apprentice. Then, in "Civil War II"-also written by Bendis-Tony is put into a coma and his A.I. personality hands the Iron Man mantle on to Riri.

This decision split a lot of people's opinions. Some people like Riri as the new Iron person because she's diverse, and diversity in comic books-especially in the last couple of years-is insanely popular. Some people hate it for the same reason, but more so because Marvel keeps replacing their established characters with characters who appeal to people of different creeds. Giving everyone a hero. Then there are the people who want to play neutral, the people who want more diversified characters, but not by replacing established ones. They want fresh, unrelated characters. Truth is, that's not the norm because it wouldn't sell. Odds are none of you reading this post know who Mosaic is. Or if you do it's because I've talked about him before. Mosaic is a new Marvel character, he's young and he's black and he's an Inhuman, but otherwise he isn't connected to any previous superheroes. Is he a good character? I'd say yes. But did he sell? Not really, his book only got twelve issues. Ms. Marvel, The All-New Ghost Rider, The Totally Awesome Hulk, those characters sell not just because they have brand recognition, but because they are written with passion and meant to feel different from their predecessors. But me? I think we can stop making the new this or the new that. Let's actually focus on the characters we've established now and not flood the market with new replacements. You can't make bank solely on advertising new characters, eventually Kamala Khan will get older and she'll stop being new. Hell, she's been around for like three years by now!

But Riri is different. Originally I didn't care about Riri. I don't really like Iron Man, why should I care if his title got the fresh 2017 coat of paint? But then I did some research on James "Rhodey" Rhodes. War Machine/Iron Patriot II/Iron Man II/a character I like more than Tony Stark. And I found something interesting. In 2014, Alex Kot and Garry Brown wrote a pretty underrated "Iron Patriot" series starring James Rhodes. In the book, Rhodey was asked to be the Iron Patriot by the U.S. military and during one storyline he was framed of committing a terrorist attack. Who would help him other than his niece Lila Rhodes. Lila is just as good as Riri and I'll break it down for you.

1. Riri is a teenaged black girl, but so is Lila.

2. Riri is a talented engineer who build a suit, Lila is also a talented engineer and managed to repair Rhodey's suit.

3. Riri caught Iron Man's attention, but Lila is Rhodey's niece and-because of that relation-she knows Tony Stark personally.

4. Big one here, folks. Bendis created Riri from scratch and took a gamble on her being likable. Lila was likable from her first appearance because she's actually related to the Iron Man Family.

Here's the thing, Bendis is a selfish writer. What does that mean? It means when he creates a character, he owns that character. Jessica Jones is an old example, but look at Riri. Only Bendis wants to write for her and only Bendis wants people to like her. In previous works, Bendis has ignored the creations and stories of other writers simply to tell "his story". That's why "Civil War II" was so uncomfortable, because it felt like Bendis was writing this book with the idea he was writing every book Marvel had that was related to it. But he wasn't. But with Riri it's even worse because he could have used Lila instead. Imagine this: War Machines dies in "Civil War II" (which happened) and Tony has to break it to Lila. And out of guilt and remorse and kindness, Tony takes Lila under his wing and tries to be as good an uncle as Rhodey was. Tony recognizes her talent-a talent Rhodey never had-and helps her master it. Maybe he tells her she can be the next War Machine and avenge Rhodey, but then-BAM-Tony is in coma. And who does he have left to leave his stuff to? His student, his surrogate niece, and the only Iron Family he has left, Lila. So Lila becomes Ironheart or War Machine or whatever and Bendis can basically write the same damn thing. Instead of Tony just "taking an interest in someone who was like him", Tony is taking some damn responsibility and trying to pay tribute to his fallen friend by helping Lila become a hero. She can still be witty, and smart, and a teenaged black girl, but now she's also related to the Iron Man Family. Bendis can still write a character who is really new and needs development, but she can have some connection to established characters and not just be a quickly drafted original character.

If Bendis wasn't being paid to writer Iron Man, his work with Riri would feel like fan-fiction. "Iron Man meets a young girl, she's really smart and funny, and he goes into a coma and then she becomes Iron Man". I mean for crying out loud she was created in the seventh issue of "Invincible Iron Man" and then by the new Issue #1 (which is basically issue fifteen) she's the new Iron Man? In no time at all. It's just stupid. In fact, Bendis almost did the same thing when he created Miles Morales/The Ultimate Spider-Man. The difference? BENDIS WAS WRITING "ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN" FOR ELEVEN YEARS. Bendis writes about Peter Parker for eleven years and then establishes his new, original character Miles Morales and that kid becomes Spider-Man. That's okay, Bendis earned it. And you know what? Miles is an alright kid. Three-dimensional. Likable. Bendis wrote about Tony Stark for fourteen issues, seven other issues, and in however many pages of Tony were in "Civil War II". Then in issue seven he creates an obvious replacement, with out-of-the-blue technological prowess, he kicks Tony to the curb and makes her Iron Man and we're all supposed to be on-board because it's just a shorter version of what he did with Spider-Man? No. No way, Bendis. As far as I'm concerned, Victor Von Doom is the rightful heir to Iron Man. Because he at least had two years of character progression to back it up.

Thanks for reading.

Go read "Infamous Iron Man". It's much better.

Cyber Facts

Are you a fan of Cyborg? Because we got One Dozen Cyborg Facts for you!

1. In Cyborg's premier origin story in 1980, Victor Stone was the child of scientists Elinore and Silas Stone. The two of them used Vic as a test subject for various enhancement experiments that would result in his IQ being above average. Because of his forced intelligence, Vic rejected the field of science and chose to play football as a way to rebel against his parents. He was also an accomplice to a group of juvenile criminals. During an experiment, a monster from another dimension killed his mother and injured him severely. After his father sends the monster back, he has no choice to turn his son into a Cyborg to keep him alive. Cyborg would come to resent his father's decision, remark on how he should have let him die with his mother, but as he matured Victor make peace with his father.

2. In 2011, Victor's origin was updated. With his mother dying from a previous experiment and him choosing to be a football player simply to avoid his father's work, Vic is injured by the activation of a Mother Box during Darkseid's first invasion. Silas uses advanced cybernetics to fuse the Mother Box to Vic's body, creating a much more powerful version of Cyborg.

3. Originally, Cyborg was created by Marv Wolfman and George Perez to be a member of the "new" Teen Titans in 1980. Similarly, Geoff Johns and Jim Lee retooled Cyborg in 2011 to be a member of the "new" Justice League. The change of team association was brought upon due to the lack of diversity on the original Justice League roster and due to the roster lacking a technology-based character. While many may assume Cyborg's League membership was established in the 2011 DC Comics reboot, Cyborg had become an official member of The Justice League in 2009 when Donna Troy and Kimiyo Hoshi/Doctor Light II invited him to be on their newest roster. He was also considered a "potential member" by Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman in 2007.

4. Due to his fusion with The Mother Box, Cyborg's abilities are far more powerful than they once were. While he used to be capable of super strength, technokinesis, and sonic beam generation, he now can open teleportation portals called Boom Tubes, translate alien languages, manipulate any computer on the planet, integrate with various forms of technology and machinery, and regenerate parts of his robotic body.

5. Cyborg used to require constant modification from his father to suit certain situations like undersea missions and space travel, but in 2016 it was established that after absorbing alien technology he gained the ability to quickly evolve his machinery to suit any situation.

6. After being hit with a missile, a group of Russian scientists repaired Cyborg, albeit with more machinery than before. Cyborg-feeling even more distant from humanity-was found by a cybernetic entity called Technis. Technis was the consciousness of an alien planet, made completely from machinery. It came into existence after Swamp Thing-who was lost in space-formed a "sexual union" with the machine planet, giving it one instance of actual life. Technis offered to repair Cyborg, and in return Cyborg would teach Technis about humanity. His own humanity started to disappear and Cyborg eventually fused with Technis and became Cyberion. As Cyberion he created a base on Earth's moon and subconsciously began kidnapping his former friends. It took The Teen Titans and The Justice League to fight Cyberion and restore Vic to his former self.

7. After that past digression, Nightwing created a clone body for Vic's mind. This body was human, but could also change into a robot form, meaning he was a "cyborg" in a different way. His new Cyborg form was simply a gold-colored version of his human body. He remained a mentor on The Teen Titans when the older members began recruited newer, younger heroes as students.

8. Cyborg was once possessed by Jericho-the resurrected son of Deathstroke. Mentally unstable, Jericho tried to use Cyborg to kill The Titans. However, Teen Titans member Static used Titans Tower's systems to overload Cyborg and force Jericho. Unfortunately, Jericho was being hunted by the murderous Vigilante, and in trying to pretend to still be Jericho and lure Vigilante out, Cyborg is shot in the head.

9. After "Infinite Crisis", Cyborg was damaged and in need of repairs for a whole year. He was kept under Titans Tower and was unaware of the events the team had experienced. When he awoke, he found Robin (Tim Drake) as the only member he was familiar with left. The rest of the roster was new to him and Vic's prior experiences left him dissatisfied with Robin's new team. This was until he discovered that while he was in a coma, all the Teen Titans would visit him and talk to him and dish out their issues to him. In finding he was useful even in a comatose state, Cyborg gave these new Titans a chance and remained the second-in-command of the team.

10. Cyborg has encountered two teams specifically organized to destroy him. First was "The Phantom Limbs", a group of elite soldiers who were crippled in the Middle East and given pieces of Cyborg's old parts to repair themselves. The second was "The Cyborg Revenge Squad" made up of Magenta, Girder, The Thinker, Cyborgirl, and The Fearsome Five's Psimon, Jinx, Gizmo, Mammoth, and Girder. His most recent foe was referred to as The Grid. When Cyborg began connecting to all computers on Earth he developed a type of A.I. system to help filter information. This system-The Grid-started to become smarter and more independent, even learning how to self-operate from hackers online. When the villain Atomica betrayed The Justice League, she uploaded a virus onto Cyborg that allowed The Grid to split off of him and become its own robotic being. Victor was left as a nearly-dead torso and The Grid became a member of The Crime Syndicate. Cyborg teamed up with The Metal Men to defeat The Grid shortly after.

11. In the world of "Kingdom Come", Cyborg has taken up the mantle of Robotman and is made from liquid metal. In the universe of "Injustice", Cyborg is part of Superman's world-conquering Regime and uses him connection to technology to be Superman's eyes around the planet. In the alternate future of "Titans Tomorrow", Cyborg 2.0 is the founder and leader of Titans East and has a physical appearance similar to the "Teen Titans" animated series version. And in the "Flashpoint" universe, Cyborg is America's greatest superhero. Dependable, home-grown, and completely malleable by his superiors.

12. In the original pitch for "Justice League" the animated series, there were supposed to be three teenaged characters who would be proteges to The Justice League. These were include Robin (Tim Drake), Impulse (Bart Allen), and a "female version of Cyborg". While the show was picked up by Kid's WB, the concept of the three teen heroes was dropped. Like the other Teen Titans featured on their own animated series, Cyborg was not allowed to appear in The Justice League-and "Justice League Unlimited"-cartoons due to an embargo stating the network did not want kids to think The Teen Titans and The Justice League were in the same animated universe.
Thanks for reading.

Stuck In a Jamm

He was a skater boy, she said "see ya later, boy". He wasn't good enough for her. So he went to the future and made girls get naked for him while he did kick-flips and threw slang around like a 1990's Nickelodeon sitcom. Today's Z-Lister is Jamm from DC Comics!

Created in 1993 by Tom Beirbaum in "The Legion of Super-Heroes Annual #4", Jamm was an unnamed teenager from the modern day. He enjoyed skateboarding, rock and roll music, and being a slacker. One day he ran into a fight between Timberwolf-basically an alien werewolf from the future-and Angon-an alien parasite from the future-who were in the midst of a battle. Jamm is injured during the fight and Timberwolf defeats Angon and tries to help Jamm, who's spinal fluid was drained. Without his permission, The Legion of Super-Heroes-an army of teenaged heroes from the 30th Century-teleported the three of them back to the future. Angon escaped and the Legion quickly operated on Jamm. After he was healed, Jamm found the bite from Angon gave him superpowers: he could make anyone do what he wanted. So, you know, brainwashing.

Using his new powers, Jamm forced Night Girl, Shadow Lass, and Valor to join him in a tour across the galaxy. Skateboarding, meeting rad new aliens, and having "jam" sessions every now and again with "his band". Jamm kept Valor around to be his bodyguard as Valor was a Daxamite-a race similar to Kryptonians. Night Girl and Shadow Lass on the other hand? Well, Jamm often used his powers to make women undress in front of him. It was never shown or mentioned whether or not he used his powers to sexually assault these women, but seeing as how he was a sexually-depraved teenager with the ability to make people do whatever he wanted to, it is not too farfetched to believe he may have done so.

In one adventure, Jamm and his victims-I mean "friends"-almost drove into a sun and Jamm was forced to release his victims from his control-I mean "wake his friends up" so they could escape the sun's gravity and return to Earth. Before sending him back to the present, Legionnaire Shadow Lass personally threatened Jamm's life and made him promise to never misuse his powers again. Jamm is then sent back to the present. Free to break his promise and force women to strip for him as much as he pleased.

Jamm sucks. Obviously. He was almost a decent character, take a skater-kid from the 90's and stick him in the totally awesome future? Bill and Ted would have totally agreed with this bodacious idea! But then it got a little too close to home when he became a sex-pest. And look, I get it. If I was a horny teenager with the ability to make any woman fawn over me, I'd be tempted to take advantage of that. Most guys would. But making the character realistic doesn't make him likable. In fact, Jamm feels more like the classic power fantasy than anyone else in comics. People like to tease Superman, or Shazam, or Spider-Man as being "power fantasies". Nearly unbeatable, super-powerful beings beating people up and getting affection from their peers. Jamm is the power fantasy you never see, the power fantasy writers don't want to create because it's too real, too true, and not entertaining. And if watching a teenage boy hypnotize women into stripping him is entertaining to you; congratulations, you're on a list.

Thanks for reading.

I hope in the next Marvel vs DC event, Jamm and The Purple Man just have a father-son bonding moment. Followed by an orgy.

Batman's Alphabet

What if Batman wrote the Alphabet?

A is for Alfred, who treats me the best.

B is for Bats, for which I obsess.

C is for Catwoman. My God, she's so hot!

D is for Dent and can we trust him or not?

E is for Enigma, these riddles are getting old.

F is for Freeze. He can be so cold.

G is for Gordon, the Commissioner on the roof.

H is for Hatter, a wonderland goof.

I is for Ivy, she smells of roses and pot.

J is for Joker. Because of him I'll never stop!

K is for Killer, whether is be Moth or Crocodile.

L is for Lazarus Pits. They keep people alive for awhile.

M is for Man-Bat, who I'm planning on suing.

N is for Nightwing. I'm so proud of his goof-doing.

O is for Oracle, who doesn't have to stand to fight.

P is for Penguin. Truly, the terror of the night.

Q is for Quinn, and her Tumblr followers too.

R is for Robin. It takes a Dynamic Duo to make two!

S is for Scarecrow, he made me guano my trunks.

T is for Terry, my favorite future punk.

U is for Under. You know, like The Red Hood?

V is for Ventriloquist. If he weren't psychotic he'd be pretty good.

W is for Wayne. I have no association with them.

Y is for Year One, I remember it now and again.

Z is for Zsasz. He's not fun he's just bent.

And that, my dear citizen, is the Batman Alphabet.

Thanks for reading.

Storm Facts

Are you a fan of Storm? You should be, because we got One Dozen Storm Facts!

1. Created by Len Wein and David Cockrum, Storm ended up being a combination of two characters: Typhoon and The Black Cat. The Black Cat had a similar costume, but due to the creation of Tigra, Hellcat, and Spider-Man's Black Cat, the character became redundant. Typhoon was originally a male superhero, but editor Roy Thomas suggested making the character a woman since the new X-Men line-up lacked a woman. Renamed Storm and given a design based off both characters, Orono appeared next to Wolverine, Colossus, Nightcrawler, Banshee, Sunfire, and Thunderbird in "Giant-Sized X-Men #1" in 1975.

2. Originally, Marvel Editorial asked Cockrum to change Storm's hair color. They were afraid if her hair was white readers might think she was elderly. Cockrum refused to budge and the character's iconic hair color remained white. In 1983, artist Paul Smith was asked to redesign Storm. Of all his submissions, Marvel Editorial went with his "joke" idea of giving her a black, leather, biker outfit and a white Mohawk. Inspired by Mr. T. The look was chosen as a goof, but ultimately the creators started to like the design. In 2013 the Mohawk look was brought back until it was yet again changed back in 2017.

3. In 2006, King T'Challa of Wakanda proposed to Storm and she became Queen of Wakanda. This marriage happened during Marvel's "Civil War" and was considered an important stepping stone for the Marvel Universe. So supported in fact, that Emmy Award-Winning Costume Designer Shawn Dudley was asked to design a wedding dress for Storm to be used in the issue the two were wed. It was also established by writers Eric Jerome Dickey and Axel Alonso that ever since their first meeting in 1980, Black Panther and Storm have had romantic interactions. Going so far as to establish that T'Challa took Orono's virginity when they were teenagers.

4. Storm's mother N'Dare was an African Princess/Witch-Priestess from a tribe in Kenya who possessed magical abilities. Her father was an American photojournalist named David Monroe. The three of them were involved in a plane crash over Egypt that left Storm an orphan. Due to being trapped under rubble with her dead parents for hours, Storm developed a serious case of claustrophobia that would haunt her for years.

5. As a child, Orono was a thief in Cairo and-after discovering her mutant abilities-she became worshiped as a Goddess by tribes people until being discovered by Professor X. After her memory was wiped and she was psychologically reverted to a child by the villain Nanny, she became a thief again. Fellow thief Gambit found Storm and jogged her memories back.

6. While not often picked as leader compared to Professor X, Cyclops, or Wolverine, Storm has led the X-Men on several occasions. The first was after the death of Jean Grey when Cyclops needed to leave the X-Men and left Storm in charge. This was in 1980. The most recent was after Wolverine died in 2014 and Storm became leader of The X-Men and Dean of their school. She also led The X-Treme X-Men and an all-women team of X-Men. She also led the underground mutant team The Morlocks, was a reserve member of The Avengers, and substituted on The Fantastic Four with Black Panther.

7. Storm has constantly battled a foe called The Shadow King, a manifestation of humanities darker desires. Shadow King was in possession of an African crime-lord that Storm worked for as a child, but was defeated by Professor X. He reappeared to battle Storm and The New Mutants, and again when Gambit protected the mentally de-aged Storm from Shadow King. Shadow King also manipulated the tribe that worshiped Storm back in the day, continuing his grudge against the mutant.

8. Like her mother, Storm comes from a long-line of mystically gifted African women. Though she has never capitalized on her heritage, alternate versions of Storm have shown her to be a powerful sorceress. Storm's spirit is so strong she was one of two people considered to be the host for Eternity-the physical manifestation of reality itself. She shared this honor with The Sorcerer Supreme, Doctor Strange.

 9. Orono Monroe/Storm is the first Black, Female Superhero in comic book history. Following her would come characters like Monica Rambeau, Misty Knight, Vixen, and many more.

10. Storm is labelled as an Omega-Level Mutant, which is a simple way of describing how powerful of a mutant she is. She can create fogs, mists, and clouds, summon rain, hail, snow, all forms of strong winds, create thunder and lightning, she can clear any weather conditions and modify atmospheric pressure, she can create precipitation, electromagnetic blasts, absorb or produce oxygen even within the human lungs, acid rain/toxic fog, flash freezes, she can bend light by using moisture creating a field of invisibility, create air pressure within the human body, she breath underwater by separating hydrogen molecules and survive in space by bringing oxygen into space and controlling her own air pressure. She can also manipulate solar winds and cosmic storms, perceive the world in the form of energies she can manipulate, and control ocean currents.

11. In the universe of "Mutant X", Orono was bitten by Dracula and is a vampire known as Bloodstorm. As Bloodstorm she continues to not kill her foes, but employs Kitty Pryde and Forge as blood suppliers. In Amalgam Comics, Storm was fused with DC Comic's Wonder Woman and became "Amazon". She led The JLX, a fusion of The Justice League and The X-Men. In "Age of Apocalypse" she is a street-wise rebel who was romantically involved with Quicksilver. During "The Asgardian Wars", Storm was manipulated by Loki and given a replica of Mjolnir. Once she held the hammer, Storm became The Goddess of Thunder. In 2015's "Secret Wars", the world was split into different realities and each world had it's own Thor as a type of enforcer. Storm made regular appearances as an alternate version of Thor.

12. Along with Black Panther, Storm has been romantically involved with Wolverine, Nightcrawler, and Cyclops. She also was so in love with Forge they almost got married.

Thanks for reading!

It's Another Bug's Life

Remember when we talked about bug characters in that post about DC's Forager? Well, I found another one. And yes, his name is Bug. I swear these guys hide like snakes in the grass. Well, like bugs in the grass. That works better actually. Today's Z-Lister is Marvel's Bug.

In 1984, Hasbro and Takara Tomy created toys called "Transformers", robots that could be transformed into vehicles. A year earlier in 1983, Tonka created "Gobots" a toy-line of similar intentions. But before there were Transformers and Gobots, there were "Micronauts" in 1976, created by Mego and Takara (later Takara Tomy). Why is this toy-line of 3-inch tall plastic robot people relevant? Well, in 1979 "Micronauts #1" was published by Marvel Comics in association with Mego. Written and drawn by Bill Mantlo and Michael Golden respectively, the comic series followed a few established characters of the toy-line, but also offered original characters like Bug. Funny enough, Mantlo requested Marvel and Mego to let him make this comic series because-after seeing his son get one for Christmas-Mantlo's imagination was captured by The Micronauts.

Described as an Insectivorid from planet Kaliklak, Bug is a master thief and resident wisecrack. He was basically a Spider-Man without webs, as his powers included wall-crawling, agility, and a "danger sense". He also wielded a Rocket-Lance as his weapon of choice. The universe he and his teammates inhabited was called "The Microverse", a universe that-no surprise-was microscopic and impossible for us to ever witness. With his fellow heroes, Bug fought against the tyranny of Baron Karza who abducted the poor and weak from various planets with the intent of mutating them into monsters.

In 1990, Marvel no longer held the publishing rights to The Micronauts, but planned on making a new Micronauts book anyway. They even hired writer Shon C. Bury and artist Cary Nord to work on it. Characters created in the Micronauts comic book who were not created by the toy-line also appeared other books like "X-Men" and "Cable". However, the then-owners of Micronauts-Abrams Gentile Entertainment-did not agree to Marvel's negotiations and the three issues already made were never published. Luckily, Marvel still owned original characters like Bug, so they continued to feature him in other books and even give him a solo one-shot comic book in 1997.

Finally, in 2007, Bug appeared in "Annihilation: Conquest" as a prisoner of the Kree. Star-Lord rescued Bug and recruited him onto his ragtag team. In 2008, when Star-Lord assembled the modern version of The Guardians of The Galaxy, Bug joined the team. Mainly to sneak peeks at Mantis. He was last seen on the team in 2012, but has not been seen since. Interestingly enough, director James Gunn revealed Bug was almost in "Guardians of The Galaxy Vol. 2", and was going to be a team member in the previous script. However, when the script was edited and rewritten, Bug was excluded.

Speaking on The Micronauts briefly, I think it is best Marvel split away from them. The idea of an entire universe being microscopic is cool and all, but if the universe itself isn't too different from something like "Star Wars", "The New Gods", or "Masters of The Universe", what's the point of even establishing that world. A franchise needs to be indistinguishable if you're going to set it in some strange dimension, otherwise the fact that it exists microscopically becomes the only cool thing about it. Imagine if someone was trying to sell you an old, average car and they told you Barack Obama used to drive it. That would be the only selling point, other than that it's just a car. Just as The Micronauts were just toy robots.

But this Bug fella is an alright character. Again, pretty much an alien Spider-Man, but with a more adult sense of humor. His powers and weapons are okay, probably better on a team format. Actually, that's probably why Bug works better on a team in general. Guys like Spider-Man, Ant-Man, and Nightcrawler play the stealthy, wisecracking, agile, slim guy role on a team, but they all have character quirks that help them hold up independent stories. Bug doesn't really have that. Being funny is his only real personality feature. Of all the Mirconauts, Bug is definitely the most usable and most interesting based on looks alone, so if he were to come back to The Guardians or to meet Nova or something I think he'd fit right in. But as far as being a solo act? Well, we got enough bug people if you ask me. One more and I may need to break out the Raid. Trademark.

Thanks for reading.