Remember that one time Mystique slept with Iceman?
2011, "X-Men #189-203" written by Mike Carey and drawn by Chris Bachalo and Humberto Ramos. This arc explores the most iconic relationship in X-Men history! Gambit and Rogue? Cyclops and Jean Grey? Kitty Pryde and anyone named Peter? Nope! Iceman-founding member of The X-Men and too dumb to a Godly elemental-and Mystique-founding member of The Brotherhood of Evil Mutants, bisexual, gender-changing psychopath who's pulled off a lot of boxers in her lifetime. At this point in time Mystique was a member of The X-Men, a member they kept on a short leash. See, the films want to portray Mystique as this complex, Robin Hood-like, mutant liberator. In reality? Mystique is insane. She's been huffing the same glue Deadpool keeps in his sock drawer. In this story, Iceman and Mystique are teaming up on a mission to take down an evil organization that almost killed Rogue. In case you didn't know, Rogue is the adopted daughter of Mystique. She was a member of The Brotherhood too, but Rogue actually had a conscious and joined the good guys. During this team-up, Iceman passively and humorously flirts with the woman who's been trying to kill him for ten years and after a few life saving moments the two find themselves in a bedroom together.
Bobby didn't know what sparked it. Maybe it was Mystique's worry over Rogue that showed some compassion under that evil, blue skin. Maybe it was the rare opportunity of working with an attractive woman who's feelings he didn't have to care about. Hooking up with Kitty or Rogue could have lasting effects on the team, and more importantly hurt the people he cares about. But this was Mystique. So Mystique told him to "pretend" like he could care. And bang!
The follow issue, Mystique shoots Rogue herself-because only SHE is allowed to kill Rogue-and fight's Iceman. But Bobby finds he's slower than usual. Mystique apparently put "neural inhibitor" on her lipstick and elsewhere. "Elsewhere" referring to her reproductive organs. And probably her feet. I dunno, Iceman seems like a foot guy. This inhibitor made it difficult for Iceman to keep up with her and she escaped.
In the years to come, Mystique would reappear disguised to get close to Iceman again only to beat him just short of death. It all finally ended when Iceman broke her down...with words! He called her out, told her she wasn't special or hurt, but broken. She wanted to help her daughter. So she shot her to remind her she was still weak. She wanted Iceman to love her. So she dedicated her free time to seducing and torturing him until she was all he could think about. Upon that, Mystique left and ended her obsession, only returning to stop Iceman after he had a mental breakdown that turned him evil.
So yeah, being manipulated by a murderous woman one hundred years older than you may not be a good defense when someone implies you might be gay, and in retrospect this experience with Mystique may have scared Iceman off the hetero-road a bit far. But he fell for it, didn't he? It's not like Iceman is a desperate loser! He's good-looking, superpowered, funny, and he hangs out with women beyond the standard caliber. He has it all and still chose to give Mystique the benefit of the doubt. Despite her past, and despite her age, and despite every other encounter with her. Maybe this whole experience just means he's too gullible. Or maybe it means he has a good heart. Such decisions are not mine to decide.
Now, Thor vs The Hulk? That I can decide!
Thanks for reading.
The answer is Thor, by the way.
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